The way that this turned my screen into a digital Jackson Pollock painting after following the first instruction, I can now see that this is something to try with a live CD rather than a hard drive and later, when I have time. Even still, it is a promising place to begin.

If anyone would like to save me the trouble, however, and figure out the precise choices to make using xubuntu and a Toshiba satellite 4080XCDT, I would be very happy.