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Thread: Toxic Behavior - Gaslighting

  1. #1
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    Jun 2020
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    Toxic Behavior - Gaslighting

    It has come to my attention that gaslighting is allowed on Ubuntu forums. I humbly request that forum admins reevaluate their current stance towards posts that contain gaslighting that continue to go uncorrected. The thread in question can be found at https://ubuntuforums.org/showthread....172&p=13968140

    I am a new user to Ubuntu/Forums and I have come here with the intentions of learning and contributing to the community, the responses I have gotten from administration have been challenging as the offender in the thread is going uncorrected and uncensored. Where as my responses are simply culled or severely edited down. This gives me the impression that the forum moderators are on the side that gaslighting is an acceptable form of communication in a discussion.

    I have spent due diligence to be explicit and precise in my language to clear up confusion and be as tactful and diplomatic as possible, especially as a new user. Moderation and the extent of which seems heavy handed and uncommunicative.
    Having my very first interaction with the Ubuntu Community as "There is more than one version of Raspberry Pi and more than one version of Ubuntu Server. You failed to mention the specifics for both."
    Should have been "response pared down to the polite essentials", but that has not been the case. The gaslight response still remains, maybe because the user who posted it has 1,300+ posts it is given a pass?

    I urge you to revisit the forum guidelines that are posted and adhere to them equally, because currently the one-sided toxic nature of moderation that I have seen does not bode well for new users contributing.
    If the ruling is that I am wrong, then tell me so, if unable, then let me know that this is not the community for new users so that I may take appropriate action.

    Thank you for your time.

  2. #2
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    Jun 2006
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    Ubuntu 20.04 Focal Fossa

    Re: Toxic Behavior - Gaslighting

    Goodness. What a storm in a teacup.

    Rather than taking offence at what was said, you could have politely pointed out any factual errors you saw in the advice given. Had you looked again at the post you take exception to, you will have seen that the poster edited it with a correction and an apology. You do not acknowledge this.

    The editing of your post was done entirely in accordance with the forum Code of Conduct:

    Finally, you agree that forum staff have the right to remove, edit, move or close any post, topic or thread at any time they see fit following the guidelines outlined below
    The part that QIII edited out was unnecessarily aggressive and melodramatic, and not at all in the spirit of this part of the forum Code of Conduct:

    We also want this to be a place where community can develop and we can enjoy one another's company. To achieve this, we strive to maintain an atmosphere that can be enjoyed by all and we ask all members of the community to be respectful at all times. This means please use etiquette and politeness. Treat people with respect. If you do this, the rest of the code of conduct won't need more than a cursory mention.
    Bandying around terms such as “toxic behaviour” and “gaslighting” simply gives the impression that you are projecting, and being histrionic.

    By the way, I’m old and grizzled enough to be impervious to most varieties of passive-aggressive behaviour.

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  3. #3
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    Re: Toxic Behavior - Gaslighting

    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecat View Post
    Goodness. What a storm in a teacup.
    This is passive aggressive. Full stop.

    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecat View Post
    Rather than taking offence at what was said, you could have politely pointed out any factual errors you saw in the advice given. Had you looked again at the post you take exception to, you will have seen that the poster edited it with a correction and an apology. You do not acknowledge this.
    I did, and my response was DELETED by moderators.

    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecat View Post
    The editing of your post was done entirely in accordance with the forum Code of Conduct:
    This is false.

    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecat View Post
    Bandying around terms such as “toxic behaviour” and “gaslighting” simply gives the impression that you are projecting, and being histrionic.
    "Gaslighting: manipulate (someone) by psychological means into questioning their own sanity."
    Your response is a fantastic example of exactly this definition.

    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecat View Post
    By the way, I’m old and grizzled enough to be impervious to most varieties of passive-aggressive behaviour.
    You seem to be a pro at passive-aggressive behavior and gaslighting, I again encourage Administration and Moderators to take a serious look and what you are saying to new users.

    Quote Originally Posted by coffeecat View Post
    Welcome to the forum!
    This seems to be the only nice thing a moderator has expressed in my entire time here. Again, this is text-book toxic behavior, I am confident I am not the only new user that this forum is losing because of current practices and culture.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2020
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    Re: Toxic Behavior - Gaslighting

    Quote Originally Posted by QIII View Post
    OK. Will the hijackers please desist and start your own threads? All you are doing is adding distractions and confusion.
    I expect that from this point forward only goney3 and those who provide answers will take part in this thread. No more "me too" responses.
    All "me to" posts from here on out will be jailed without warning.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kradenko View Post
    100%, My apologies. I would have thought a discussion regarding the same topic would go in the same thread.
    I will go make my own thread about exactly the same subject.
    Sorry again,
    D.
    The toxic behavior of moderators on this subject continues to amaze me, other users are pointing it out now. A holiday may be in order to preserve discussion and community at this point. Too much time in the trenches is showing illogical intolerance.

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