hi thanks again for your reply, I tried a few times to install the bcm43xx-fwcutter from the hardy CD but like you said it needed to download the firmware from the web but I should be able to look up how to do it manually.
as for the synaptic, I opened the apt.conf file and it seems to have my proxy settings in it but I still can't get anything off synaptic.
my apt.conf file says
Is this problem solvable for the update managager at all or will I just have to use workarounds? If so I might have to move back to gutsy, though according to the launchpad note it was a bug in previous releases as well, so I dont know why its stopped working on this one when it worked on feisty and gutsy? But anyway its only a day out.