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You suffer a buffer overflow and your brain gets hacked by a twelve year old.

I wish to rescue a princess from a dragon.

You are turned into a fly and are quickly swatted as you buzz around her head.

I wish Angela Gossow would sing me a lullaby when I go to bed tonight.

From now on the colour red will be referred to as infrared and all our knowledge of the previous meaning of infrared is lost. TV remotes are considered to operate by ritually sacrificing a...

We hire an overpriced underqualified consultant to reboot the genie and debug your wish. He's so bad at it that it takes him long enough for mosquitoes to go extinct... along with all other life on...

That self referential wish gets stuck in an infinite loop when the genie executes it.

I wish I currently had the time to substantially refactor Wakame-vdc's code and write a thorough unit testing...

UF hardens and takes back login responsibility but they're hardened up so much that they have turned to stone and the login system goes unmaintained.

I wish Metallion would come back and finally...

And I wish to attend.

It doesn't. Awesome just doesn't exist at all. We are all doomed to live sad lives now.

I wish I had a new pair of 1337 headphones.

When you do a little stalking here and there, you tend to know these things. ;)



Dogface05 travels to the year 2102 and unlocks the door to the SPA office, which is the Belgian socialist party....

An anthill in your backyard elects a responsible and accountable government. The ants become so powerful that they soon take over your house. For this the old lady next door calls you a proportional...

They have glowing abilities like terribly bugged bolts of lightning do. They suffer from a bug in science causing them not to originate from electric fields built up by collisions between liquid and...

The first time you use it, you accidentally slaughter all of your family although you don't injure yourself.

Actually deadlines are fine. I just wish all of them could be met without doing...

You get to drink from that sewer pipe.

I wish for the complete decimation of deadlines. Especially mine that are too tight from the start.

You are freed of all rules including the laws of physics. You just bounce all over the place like Carmageddon in pinball mode. It isn't long before your skulls is cracked open and your brain feasted...

Solid Jolie was cloned in the Les Enfants Terrible project and even though she is your age, her purposely shortened lifespan physically turns her into a grandma. Her codename is also changed to Old...

You have sown your lawn full of piranha plants. Not only do you have to be worried about being eaten alive every time you leave the house, you are now also sued by both Nintendo and whoever made...

It happens and every new movie in either franchise is dedicated to it. The empire of Star Wars is led by Jar Jar Binks and the federation of Star Trek is led by Wesley Crusher.

I wish for MetalRob...

Everybody has hovercars but only your hovercar has opposite magnetic polarity from all the others. Have fun trying to manoeuvre that through traffic. ;)

I wish Sissy13's starship was shaped like a...

We'll make him an offer he can't refuse. You wake up the next morning, with your sheets covered in blood. You look ever and scream as you find a decapitated horse head staring back at you.... with...

The CD its on sprouts legs and attends a meeting of the Tokyo Linux Users Group. Since there's a lot of stuff running Linux there, you could say it has come to Linux. Me and it have a few beers too...

Deadpool's video game is the original Super Mario Bros.

I wish life were more like a video game.

Phew. Good thing Yokohama is only a 30 minute trainride away from Tokyo. ;-) I actually quickly went over there and back to see a WWE show one evening last year.



A hugely promoted football...

You awakened Scrappy Doo! :shock: He takes over the world and constantly has his character's worst scenes from the cartoon playing loudly on giant monitors everywhere. Anybody caught complaining is...

She does for 3 seconds because she's so grateful that you agreed to move all her bedroom furniture to her new bedroom 3 stories above the current one... using the stairs. Now get to work!

I wish...

It's still going but all cameramen are doing silly walks while filming.

I wish for something completely different.