1 Attachment(s)
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Greetiungs!
Back in post 16803 I contributed my Conky with clock, calendar, sysmon and weather. Since then I have worked a bit more on the weather unit adding moonphase and changing the source of weather data. Both the mooonphase and weather now use the post option in wget to download a php-generated webpage and then parsing it down to the desired format. Moonphase is from the Navy Observatory and weather is from the NWS from a page developed for small device access. It is necessary to modify the post data for your location. I used the LiveHTTPHeaders tool in Firefox to determine exactly what was being passed. Sometimes this is echoed in the URL that comes back. The moonphase shell script modifies the post data which can lead to some interesting access capabilities.
The moon font is 'negative' for display on a light background. Mine is dark so I have the moon phase in black laid over a full moon in light. It is also necessary to install the moon phase font.
conkyrc_weather
Code:
#==============================================================================
# conkyrc_weather
#
# by mjjohanson based on work by TeoBigusGeekus
#
#==============================================================================
background yes
update_interval 2000
double_buffer yes
no_buffers yes
text_buffer_size 2048
gap_x 44
gap_y 720
minimum_size 170 480
maximum_width 170
own_window yes
own_window_type override
own_window_transparent yes
own_window_hints undecorate,sticky,skip_taskbar,skip_pager,below
border_inner_margin 1
border_outer_margin 1
alignment tr
draw_shades no
draw_outline no
draw_borders no
draw_graph_borders no
override_utf8_locale yes
use_xft yes
xftfont ubuntu:size=7
xftalpha 0.5
uppercase 20
default_color cccccc #text
color1 999999 #lines
color2 aaaaaa #icons
color3 888888 #footer
color4 666666 #moon phase
color5 444444
lua_load ~/.conky/weather/set_icon.lua
lua_load ~/.conky/weather/set_moon.lua
TEXT
${exec sh ~/.conky/weather/conky_weather.sh}
${exec sh ~/.conky/weather/conky_moon.sh}
${color1}${hr 1}${color2}
${font conkyweather:size=32}${lua_parse conky_set_icon 1}${color}${font}
${voffset -44}${goto 130}${color4}${font Moon Phases:size=32}0
${voffset -43}${goto 130}${color 000000}${lua_parse conky_set_moon}${color}${font}
${voffset -40}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '1p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${voffset 2}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '2p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${color1}${hr 1}${color2}
${font conkyweather:size=32}${lua_parse conky_set_icon 4}${color}${font}
${voffset -42}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '4p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${voffset 2}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '5p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${color1}${hr 1}${color2}
${font conkyweather:size=32}${lua_parse conky_set_icon 7}${color}${font}
${voffset -42}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '7p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${voffset 2}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '8p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${color1}${hr 1}${color2}
${font conkyweather:size=32}${lua_parse conky_set_icon 10}${color}${font}
${voffset -42}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '10p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${voffset 2}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '11p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${voffset 2}${color1}${hr 1}${color2}
${font conkyweather:size=32}${lua_parse conky_set_icon 13}${color}${font}
${voffset -42}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '13p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${voffset 2}${goto 52}${exec sed -n '14p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast | fold -s -w 28}
${color1}${hr 1}${color3}
${font ubuntu:size=6}last update ${time %e %B %Y %H:%M}
conky_weather.sh (download weather data and parse the file for display)
Code:
#!/bin/bash
# by mjjohanson
#
wget -O ~/.conky/weather/weather_data http://mobile.weather.gov/port_mp_ns.php? --post-data="select=1&CityName=Minneapolis&site=MPX&State=MN&warnzone=MNZ060" #saved as HTML file
grep -E "Tonight" <~/.conky/weather/weather_data >~/.conky/weather/forecast #put forecast line in new file
sed -i 's/<br><br><b>/\n/g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #change code sequence to new line
sed -i 's/<\/b>.../-/g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #change code sequence to dash
sed -i 's/<br><br><br><hr>//g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #change code sequence to dash
sed -i '1 s/<b>//' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #delete code sequence
sed -i 's/\.\.\./ /' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #change ellipsis to space
sed -i 's/\. /\n/1' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #replace first dot with new line
sed -i 's/\.$/\n/' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #replace last dot with new line
sed -i 's/\./\\\n/g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #change rest of dots to \ and new line
sed -i 's/\([0-9]\) percent/\1%/g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #change percent to symbol
sed -i '/mph/!s/\([0-9]\) /\1° /g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #add degree symbol after temp in lines
sed -i 's/\([0-9]\)\\$/\1°\\/g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #add degree symbol after temp at end of lines with \
sed -i 's/\([0-9]\)$/\1°/g' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #add degree symbol after temp at end of lines without \
sed -i ':a; /\\$/N; s/\\\n//; ta' ~/.conky/weather/forecast #concatenate lines with trailing \
set_icon.lua (determine the appropriate weather icon)
Code:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-- set_icon
-- parses weather line and returns letter of weather icon
--
function conky_set_icon(line)
local str = "${exec sed -n \'" .. line .. "\p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast}"
local text = string.lower(conky_parse(str))
if string.find(text, "tonight") then
if string.find(text, "clear") then return("A")
elseif string.find(text, "thunderstorms") then return("K")
elseif string.find(text, "partly cloudy") then return("C")
elseif string.find(text, "cloudy") then return("D")
elseif string.find(text, "scattered clouds") then return("B")
elseif string.find(text, "overcast") then return("D")
elseif string.find(text, "freezing") then return("O")
elseif string.find(text, "sleet") then return("O")
elseif string.find(text, "flurries") then return("O")
elseif string.find(text, "snow") then return("r")
elseif string.find(text, "fog") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "haze") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "rain") then return("G")
else
return("-")
end
else
if string.find(text, "clear") then return("a")
elseif string.find(text, "sunny") then return("b")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of snow") then return("o")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of flurries") then return("p")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of thunderstorms") then return("m")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of rain") then return("g")
elseif string.find(text, "sleet") then return("w")
elseif string.find(text, "freezing rain") then return("v")
elseif string.find(text, "thunderstorms") then return("n")
elseif string.find(text, "light rain") then return("g")
elseif string.find(text, "overcast") then return("f")
elseif string.find(text, "mostly cloudy") then return("d")
elseif string.find(text, "partly cloudy") then return("c")
elseif string.find(text, "cloudy") then return("e")
elseif string.find(text, "scattered clouds") then return("b")
elseif string.find(text, "fog") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "haze") then return("7")
elseif string.find(text, "rain") then return("i")
elseif string.find(text, "snow") then return("r")
else
return("-")
end
end
end
conky_moon.sh (grab and parse moon phase data - there is a lot of other sun and moon info available)
Code:
#!/bin/bash
# by mjjohanson
data="FFX=1&ID=Ubuntu&xxy="$(date +"%Y")"&xxm="$(date +"%m")"&xxd="$(date +"%d")"&st=MN&place=minneapolis&ZZZ=END"
wget -O ~/.conky/weather/moon_data http://aa.usno.navy.mil/cgi-bin/aa_pap.pl --post-data="$data"
grep -E "Phase of the Moon" <~/.conky/weather/moon_data >~/.conky/weather/moonphase #put moon phase line in new file
sed -i 's/^ <p>Phase.* //' ~/.conky/weather/moonphase #remove beginning of line up to phase description
set_moon.lua (selects the moon phase icon)
Code:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-- set_moon
-- parses moon phase line and returns letter of moon icon
-- see http://www.dafont.com/moon-phases.font
function conky_set_moon()
local str = "${exec sed -n '1p' ~/.conky/weather/moonphase}"
local text = string.lower(conky_parse(str))
if string.find(text, "new") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "waxing crescent") then return("D")
elseif string.find(text, "first quarter") then return("G")
elseif string.find(text, "waxing gibbous") then return("J")
elseif string.find(text, "full") then return("@")
elseif string.find(text, "waning gibbous") then return("P")
elseif string.find(text, "last quarter") then return("T")
elseif string.find(text, "waning crescent") then return("W")
else
return("+")
end
end
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Quote:
Originally Posted by
mjjohanson
Code:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-- set_icon
-- parses weather line and returns letter of weather icon
--
function conky_set_icon(line)
local str = "${exec sed -n \'" .. line .. "\p' ~/.conky/weather/forecast}"
local text = string.lower(conky_parse(str))
if string.find(text, "tonight") then
if string.find(text, "clear") then return("A")
elseif string.find(text, "thunderstorms") then return("K")
elseif string.find(text, "partly cloudy") then return("C")
elseif string.find(text, "cloudy") then return("D")
elseif string.find(text, "scattered clouds") then return("B")
elseif string.find(text, "overcast") then return("D")
elseif string.find(text, "freezing") then return("O")
elseif string.find(text, "sleet") then return("O")
elseif string.find(text, "flurries") then return("O")
elseif string.find(text, "snow") then return("r")
elseif string.find(text, "fog") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "haze") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "rain") then return("G")
else
return("-")
end
else
if string.find(text, "clear") then return("a")
elseif string.find(text, "sunny") then return("b")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of snow") then return("o")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of flurries") then return("p")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of thunderstorms") then return("m")
elseif string.find(text, "chance of rain") then return("g")
elseif string.find(text, "sleet") then return("w")
elseif string.find(text, "freezing rain") then return("v")
elseif string.find(text, "thunderstorms") then return("n")
elseif string.find(text, "light rain") then return("g")
elseif string.find(text, "overcast") then return("f")
elseif string.find(text, "mostly cloudy") then return("d")
elseif string.find(text, "partly cloudy") then return("c")
elseif string.find(text, "cloudy") then return("e")
elseif string.find(text, "scattered clouds") then return("b")
elseif string.find(text, "fog") then return("0")
elseif string.find(text, "haze") then return("7")
elseif string.find(text, "rain") then return("i")
elseif string.find(text, "snow") then return("r")
else
return("-")
end
end
end
i get my weather in a similar way, using curl/grep/awk etc
ive been wanting to get a weather icon so i just installed the conkyweather font and was looking for a list of what weather conditions = what letter
so the above script is exactly what ive been looking for :D
thanks
and there is it down at the bottom... along with some added color and a few more bits and pieces
http://ompldr.org/tODMzcw
edit - just realised that the weather icon is going to need a little more tweaking
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Quote:
Originally Posted by
P1C0
Hello conky users! I've been fidling with conky for a couple of hours and (you've probably been asked for this a lot) I can't make it transparent.
I have Lucid 64bit and compiz in normal mode.
Here is my .conkyrc (default with some modification for double buffers and other stuff)
Code:
alignment top_right
background no
border_width 1
cpu_avg_samples 2
default_color white
default_outline_color white
default_shade_color white
draw_borders no
draw_graph_borders yes
draw_outline no
draw_shades no
use_xft yes
xftfont DejaVu Sans Mono:size=12
gap_x 5
gap_y 60
minimum_size 5 5
net_avg_samples 2
double_buffer yes
out_to_console no
out_to_stderr no
extra_newline no
own_window yes
own_window_class Conky
own_window_type desktop
own_window_transparent yes
#own_window_hints undecorated,below,sticky,skip_taskbar,skip_pager
stippled_borders 0
update_interval 1.0
uppercase no
use_spacer none
show_graph_scale no
show_graph_range no
TEXT
${scroll 16 $nodename - $sysname $kernel on $machine | }
$hr
${color grey}Uptime:$color $uptime
${color grey}Frequency (in MHz):$color $freq
${color grey}Frequency (in GHz):$color $freq_g
${color grey}RAM Usage:$color $mem/$memmax - $memperc% ${membar 4}
${color grey}Swap Usage:$color $swap/$swapmax - $swapperc% ${swapbar 4}
${color grey}CPU Usage:$color $cpu% ${cpubar 4}
${color grey}Processes:$color $processes ${color grey}Running:$color $running_processes
$hr
${color grey}File systems:
/ $color${fs_used /}/${fs_size /} ${fs_bar 6 /}
${color grey}Networking:
Up:$color ${upspeed eth0} ${color grey} - Down:$color ${downspeed eth0}
$hr
${color grey}Name PID CPU% MEM%
${color lightgrey} ${top name 1} ${top pid 1} ${top cpu 1} ${top mem 1}
${color lightgrey} ${top name 2} ${top pid 2} ${top cpu 2} ${top mem 2}
${color lightgrey} ${top name 3} ${top pid 3} ${top cpu 3} ${top mem 3}
${color lightgrey} ${top name 4} ${top pid 4} ${top cpu 4} ${top mem 4}
These will help you on your path. Get Screenruler from the repositories too.
Conky Configuration Variables (Above the TEXT section.)
Conky Objects (Below the TEXT section.)
Conky Pitstop (Source for how-to-use scripts.)
kaivalagi's weather script.
kaivalagi's misc scripts.
Other kaivalagi python scripts for use with Conky.
The answer to your question is in the Conky Configuration Variables.
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Another example for INK....
This is for my printer. Make you necessary changes.
#########################
# - Printer Ink Level - #
#########################
${font Droid Sans:style=Bold:size=8}PRINTER INK $stippled_hr${font}
${texeci 10800 ink -p usb | grep EPSON}
Photoblack${offset 10}${color black}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Photoblack | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}
Cyan${offset 40}${color cyan}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Cyan | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}
Yellow${offset 31}${color yellow}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Yellow | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}
Magenta${offset 21}${color Magenta}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Magenta | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}${font}
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Quote:
Originally Posted by
42dorian
Thank you for your reply and the links :) I sorted it out through conky configuration and ccsm and came here to post my conky and screen.
Code:
alignment top_right
background no
border_width 1
cpu_avg_samples 2
default_color white
default_outline_color white
default_shade_color white
draw_borders no
draw_graph_borders yes
draw_outline no
draw_shades no
use_xft yes
xftfont DejaVu Sans Mono:size=9
gap_x 20
gap_y 40
minimum_size 5 5
net_avg_samples 2
double_buffer yes
out_to_console no
out_to_stderr no
extra_newline no
own_window yes
own_window_class Conky
own_window_type override
own_window_transparent yes
stippled_borders 0
update_interval 3.0
uppercase no
use_spacer none
show_graph_scale no
show_graph_range no
TEXT
$color
${color orange}SYSTEM ${hr 2}$color
${uid_name 1000}@$nodename $sysname $kernel on $machine
${color orange}CPU ${hr 2}$color
Core 0: ${freq 1}MHz ${alignr}Core 1: ${freq 2}MHz
${cpubar cpu1 5,160} ${alignr}${cpubar cpu2 5,160}
${cpugraph cpu1 25,160 000000 0000FF -l} ${alignr}${cpugraph cpu2 25,160 000000 0000FF -l}
Load: ${loadavg} Temp: ${acpitemp}
${color orange}NAME PID CPU% MEM% ${hr 2}$color
${top name 1} ${top pid 1} ${top cpu 1} ${top mem 1}
${top name 2} ${top pid 2} ${top cpu 2} ${top mem 2}
${top name 3} ${top pid 3} ${top cpu 3} ${top mem 3}
${top name 4} ${top pid 4} ${top cpu 4} ${top mem 4}
${color orange}MEMORY / DISK ${hr 2}$color
RAM: $memperc% ${membar 6}
Swap: $swapperc% ${swapbar 6}
Root: ${fs_free_perc /}% ${fs_bar 6 /}
sdc1: ${fs_free_perc /media/sdc1}% ${fs_bar 6 /media/sdc1}
sdc5: ${fs_free_perc /media/sdc5}% ${fs_bar 6 /media/sdc5}
${color orange}NETWORK (${addr eth0}) ${hr 2}$color
Down: ${downspeed eth0} k/s ${alignr}Up: ${upspeed eth0} k/s
${downspeedgraph eth0 25,160 000000 ff0000 -l} ${alignr}${upspeedgraph eth0 25,160 000000 00ff00 -l}
Total: ${totaldown eth0} ${alignr}Total: ${totalup eth0}
Inbound: ${tcp_portmon 1 32767 count} Outbound: ${tcp_portmon 32768
61000 count}${alignr}Total: ${tcp_portmon 1 65535 count}
${color orange}LOGGING ${hr 2}$color
${execi 30 tail -n3 /var/log/messages | fold -w50}
${color orange}FORTUNE ${hr 2}$color
${execi 120 fortune -s | fold -w50}
http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/6213/picoconky.th.png
1 Attachment(s)
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Yes, wnelson, we get it. But, I've already moved way beyond that. I have a graphical indicator system in place using ink, telling me how much of each cartridge is left. See?
Code:
${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Photoblack' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<50}${image ~/Conky/Icons/LowInkBlackLED.png -p 145,57 -s 20x20}${else}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Photoblack' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}>=50}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Photoblack' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<60}${image ~/Conky/Icons/HalfInkBlackLED.png -p 145,57 -s 20x20}${else}${image ~/Conky/Icons/NormInkBlackLED.png -p 145,57 -s 20x20}${endif}${endif}${endif}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Yellow' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<50}${image ~/Conky/Icons/LowInkYellowLED.png -p 170,57 -s 20x20}${else}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Yellow' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}>=50}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Yellow' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<60}${image ~/Conky/Icons/HalfInkYellowLED.png -p 170,57 -s 20x20}${else}${image ~/Conky/Icons/NormInkYellowLED.png -p 170,57 -s 20x20}${endif}${endif}${endif}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Magenta' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<50}${image ~/Conky/Icons/LowInkMagentaLED.png -p 195,57 -s 20x20}${else}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Magenta' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}>=50}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Magenta' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<60}${image ~/Conky/Icons/HalfInkMagentaLED.png -p 195,57 -s 20x20}${else}${image ~/Conky/Icons/NormInkMagentaLED.png -p 195,57 -s 20x20}${endif}${endif}${endif}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Cyan' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<50}${image ~/Conky/Icons/LowInkCyanLED.png -p 220,57 -s 20x20}${else}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Cyan' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}>=50}${if_match ${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Cyan' | awk '{print $2}' | sed 's/%//'}<60}${image ~/Conky/Icons/HalfInkCyanLED.png -p 220,57 -s 20x20}${else}${image ~/Conky/Icons/NormInkCyanLED.png -p 220,57 -s 20x20}${endif}${endif}${endif}
${voffset -40}${font}Indicators:${voffset 20}
${font TransponderAOE:bold:size=8}${voffset -20}${goto 150}${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Photoblack' | awk '{print $2}'}${goto 170}${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Yellow' | awk '{print $2}'}${goto 195}${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Magenta' | awk '{print $2}'}${goto 220}${execi 60 ink -p usb | grep 'Cyan' | awk '{print $2}'}${font}${voffset -15}
We thank you for your contributions to the Conky world, but what you're showing is just the same as what you showed before. Nothing different. C'mon. Do a little better and show off a bit, will ya? ;)
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Quote:
Originally Posted by
wnelson
Another example for INK....
This is for my printer. Make you necessary changes.
#########################
# - Printer Ink Level - #
#########################
${font Droid Sans:style=Bold:size=8}PRINTER INK $stippled_hr${font}
${texeci 10800 ink -p usb | grep EPSON}
Photoblack${offset 10}${color black}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Photoblack | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}
Cyan${offset 40}${color cyan}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Cyan | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}
Yellow${offset 31}${color yellow}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Yellow | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}
Magenta${offset 21}${color Magenta}${execibar 10800 ink -p usb | grep Magenta | awk '{print $2}'| sed 's/%//'}${color0}${font}
@ 42dorian... i could probably link to maybe... ( hmmm this thread has now 16917 posts..so lets be conservative and say that 25% contain repetition (probably a whole lot more) ) 2200 posts that aren't "groundbreaking" in terms of conky content (i can claim my fair share of those posts)
i think wnelson deserves some slack for bringing attention to the whole ink thing in the first place
lets not be the conky thought police
and in actual fact seeing as you yourself cited the execbar etc as amongst the least used of the conky objects, (and having tried the execibar myself recently) i think it is new to see that object being implemented
edit - but im not the conky police either so it doesn't matter if i think its new or interesting
wnelson has just as much right to post his conky code as anyone else and he should be able to do so without fear of being shot down
a screenshot would be good alongside that code wnelson
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
NO NO! I'm egging him on, not telling him off! He deserves to be egged on! He brought it to us, I showed him I did something completely different with it, HIS move now. C'mon mrpeachy! Play along! :D Be PLAYFUL with the guy! :D He brought us the new ink idea, let's have some fun with him. How many new guys come to us with useful stuff compared to problems?
C'mon man. Stop assuming the worst all the time.
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
Quote:
Originally Posted by
42dorian
NO NO! I'm egging him on, not telling him off! He deserves to be egged on! He brought it to us, I showed him I did something completely different with it, HIS move now. C'mon mrpeachy! Play along! :D Be PLAYFUL with the guy! :D He brought us the new ink idea, let's have some fun with him. How many new guys come to us with useful stuff compared to problems.
C'mon man. Stop assuming the worst all the time.
That's fine, and I know you wouldn't intend any offence, but all I have (all any of us have) are the words on the screen and I did not take away from that post the meaning you were going for at all.
Re-reading the post in light of knowing your intention, it's still very hard to read it that way.
Re: Post your .conkyrc files w/ screenshots
It was INTENDED to offend him, so he'd lash back with a better use of Ink. That's why it was written that way. Then we'd get a little fun in, playing with the new toy in Conky. He has no screenshots in any of his posts, so it also would've forced him to present one (or more, depending on how long it went on.) Hence why the post ended with "Do better and show off a bit."
He's new to the rest of us, and considering he brought us the new toy, this is the fastest way I know of to prod him into us getting to know him better. He posts so rarely! I wanted to egg him on, not beg him to post. That's pathetic. SO EGG HIM ON ALREADY! :P Come on now.