kvidell
July 31st, 2005, 08:11 AM
Note: In this story (Which was originally written in my Journal, I decided it was interesting enough for you guys), Chris is forum member Arthemys.
Many of you may know that I really love going on walks. So much so that I even make Chris go on them with me occasionally.
Tonight was one of those nights. So at around midnight I convince him that going for a walk is a good idea, and we get some walking-clothes on and head out (After being hassled by his perpetually "I'm more angry than you" mother.)
We head out down the hill his house is situated upon and are stopped by his friend Eric, who lives two houses up the hill from him. We BS with Eric a little, tell him his sister is chewing snuff, and are on our way down the hill again after Eric remembers how to shift his old S10.
We wander out and get harassed by drunk teens and eventually decide to head for his Ex-High School.
We get there, I get creeped out by the Chip Burner and the old Dairy building, and we start walking back up the road until we get to the intersection.
I had been complaining about wanting some form of food item because I was kind of hungry for whatever reason, and at about that moment we notice that the Cumberland Farms is still open (Equivelant to AM/PM (Too Much Good Stuff(TM))).
We wander in and head for the beverage section. For some reason I think Coffee from this establishment is going to be a good idea so I fill a "Large" (16oz) cup with "Hazelnut" and start loading it up with Irish Creme flavoured Coffee Mate and the packets of "Real" sugar.
Then we decide to look for food items. I head for the Pringles but Chris tempts me with evil words. "Cheese burgers!" he proclaims... So of course I reseat the tin of Pringles and skitter over to the "meat" department.
There they are, Double Cheeseburgers and 1/4lb CheeseBurgers w/ Bacon! I get a Double and Chris gets a Bacon.
They're in this strange vented plastic wrap with a big "Heat On #7" on them. This is Bad Food code for "Button 7 on your Panasonic Convenience Store Microwave Oven."
We pop in our burgers one at a time and push the big red "7" on the face of the oven. This apprently is 60 seconds on "Molten Meat Maker" mode.
Two minutes later we have our toasty warm burgers, our cups of Drek(TM-Clint K.) coffee and are ready to head out.... Oh, I also have about 12 packets of miscelaneous condiments to slather our burgers in. Yum.
Santa's younger, and much more rotund brother Gary rings us up and we're on our way!
Back across the street and out towards Downtown Barre we go.
We wander along Barre juggling our way-too-warm items and as we approach the Post Office, I spot something meant only to strike terror into the hearts of small children.
A black lab.
Cute one at that.
Chris gets all cute and "OMG A STRAY DOG WE'RE GOING TO DIE" and I go all "OMGPUPPYGIMMEGIMME" (It wasn't a puppy, but you know how I am.)
I decide not to attract it's attention outright just to keep Chris from threatening me with his Bacon Burger (Which are still closed, mind you) and we get almost all the way past the Post Office when doggie goes "Ha. idiots. I knew you were there, I was just eating food! I come see yo now! ^.^ YAYS PEOPLE" and starts to follow us.
As I suspected, he's extremely friendly, lonely, and probably very hungry. He also has tags on so I wasn't too worried anyway.
This time of year in Barre it's the town's Home Coming thing, so there's a lot of scrap food _everywhere_, so my idea was to just take him past the main place where ****-went-down and hopefully he'll find something distracting and go for it, and Chris and I can be on our way...
No such luck. Why go for **** food when these two friendly humans walk by with beef, bacon and cheese? Warm and moist yet, even, still in the wrappers just waiting to be eaten.
So we wander a long up to where we decided we were going to eat our "food" items, and he follows us the whole way. Chris opens his and while he's eating his I decide I'm going to try to figure out who this cute black, and very obediant little boy is. (I said Sit for no reason just to see and sure enough, he sat as pretty as any of my dogs ever has. He also minded "stay" pretty well.)
I whip out Chris' LED flashlight and read his tags. One was his Rabies Vac and the other was his Barre City Reg. tag. (#427)
No name though, oh well.
It should also be mentioned at this point that our boss neglected to pay this month's cell phone bill, so we can't make outgoing calls from our phones, but since we aren't over on minutes, we can still do Data stuff (IM, e-mail, mobile-web) and recieve calls.
I decide I'm going to try anyway and dial 411... No good. Ring's twice then goes silent.
About this point a cop drives by but we notice too late and he's gone... So after Chris decides that his burger is putrid, I wander down to the street to eat mine and wait for another police officer to drive by so I can attempt at getting his attention.... Chris has started tossing chunks of bacon and burger to our friend, whom we dubbed Itchy Buddy (He had da fleas pretty bad).
Chris finishes tossing his burger to Buddy and I get about half-way through with mine when Buddy decides he's bored with the little park and comes over to say hi to me. I feed him the rest of mine (It was terrible, but boy if he didn't love it.)
After he finishes with that (which took all of 4 seconds), we decide to wander back out to mainstreet and hope for more police officers.
We wander up Main Street again and a cop that Chris so affectionately referred to as "Baldy" drives by, I flag to him but he just waves at me and keeps driving.
Ugh.
About 20 seconds later an ambulance drives by. I figure maybe they can request a peace officer be sent, so I try to flag him down... No good, he just waves to me as well and continues on his merry paramedical way.
Ugh^2.
Chris and I decide we'll try to ditch our friend (who by the way minds VERY well. Anytime he'd get too close to the street for my comfort I'd say "Sidewalk buddy!" and he'd saunter back over to the middle of the sidewalk), so we go back to where all the tables, chairs, and misc. food leftovers are being stored for the night when Chris goes "Wait... Maybe there'll be someone manning the police station!" I ask him where that is and he points to a building that was about 20 feet away... I stare at him blankly for a moment, give him back his flashlight and tell him to keep Buddy company.
I jog off towards the police station and go inside. It's very small, not really a police _station_ so much as a little... middle of the town watch-out post.
Sure enough there's a female police officer sitting inside sipping on some coffee... She radios something up then asks me if I need any help. I tell her we've aquired a new friend and she smiles at me and says "There's a Sherrif out there with your friends already. He just showed up!" I smile, say thank you and jog outside.
Sure enough, Chris and Buddy and standing next to a Washington County Sheriff car. I jog back over across the street to them and the officer asks us for his Reg #, I tell him it's 427 and about that time a Barre PD pulls up behind him.
Buddy starts to get nervous about now. Two large vehicles, Chris and I, and 3 large men in uniforms with lots of clanky dangling things are kind of encroaching upon his position. I eye one of the cops to stay back because the dog was getting nervous and he does so. The sheriff gives the Barre Police officer Buddy's Reg number, gets in his Impala and drives away.
Buddy's much calmer now and Chris notices that there's a little "badge" on Buddy's collar that reads "Jack (Some Phone Number I don't Recall), Barre, VT."
I smile, say hi to Jack, he tries to lick me but I refuse. The cop takes down the phone number and gives it to dispatch and we hand Jack over to him.
He opens the back door, Jack happily jumps in and curls up on the backseat and the officers tell us "Thank you" and "Goodnight" and are off.
I feel good inside.
I just hope Jack wasn't out because his owners suck. Then I'd be sad.
I like antihistamines. Does it show much?
I'd also like to point out that I think I'm already regretting that burger, and Chris just had a rather lovely bathroom experience I'm told.
- Kev
Edit: Chris mused: "I wonder if Jack went gassy on the cops... Burger did good things for me..."
HAHA x.x;
We're sorry, Barre PD.
Many of you may know that I really love going on walks. So much so that I even make Chris go on them with me occasionally.
Tonight was one of those nights. So at around midnight I convince him that going for a walk is a good idea, and we get some walking-clothes on and head out (After being hassled by his perpetually "I'm more angry than you" mother.)
We head out down the hill his house is situated upon and are stopped by his friend Eric, who lives two houses up the hill from him. We BS with Eric a little, tell him his sister is chewing snuff, and are on our way down the hill again after Eric remembers how to shift his old S10.
We wander out and get harassed by drunk teens and eventually decide to head for his Ex-High School.
We get there, I get creeped out by the Chip Burner and the old Dairy building, and we start walking back up the road until we get to the intersection.
I had been complaining about wanting some form of food item because I was kind of hungry for whatever reason, and at about that moment we notice that the Cumberland Farms is still open (Equivelant to AM/PM (Too Much Good Stuff(TM))).
We wander in and head for the beverage section. For some reason I think Coffee from this establishment is going to be a good idea so I fill a "Large" (16oz) cup with "Hazelnut" and start loading it up with Irish Creme flavoured Coffee Mate and the packets of "Real" sugar.
Then we decide to look for food items. I head for the Pringles but Chris tempts me with evil words. "Cheese burgers!" he proclaims... So of course I reseat the tin of Pringles and skitter over to the "meat" department.
There they are, Double Cheeseburgers and 1/4lb CheeseBurgers w/ Bacon! I get a Double and Chris gets a Bacon.
They're in this strange vented plastic wrap with a big "Heat On #7" on them. This is Bad Food code for "Button 7 on your Panasonic Convenience Store Microwave Oven."
We pop in our burgers one at a time and push the big red "7" on the face of the oven. This apprently is 60 seconds on "Molten Meat Maker" mode.
Two minutes later we have our toasty warm burgers, our cups of Drek(TM-Clint K.) coffee and are ready to head out.... Oh, I also have about 12 packets of miscelaneous condiments to slather our burgers in. Yum.
Santa's younger, and much more rotund brother Gary rings us up and we're on our way!
Back across the street and out towards Downtown Barre we go.
We wander along Barre juggling our way-too-warm items and as we approach the Post Office, I spot something meant only to strike terror into the hearts of small children.
A black lab.
Cute one at that.
Chris gets all cute and "OMG A STRAY DOG WE'RE GOING TO DIE" and I go all "OMGPUPPYGIMMEGIMME" (It wasn't a puppy, but you know how I am.)
I decide not to attract it's attention outright just to keep Chris from threatening me with his Bacon Burger (Which are still closed, mind you) and we get almost all the way past the Post Office when doggie goes "Ha. idiots. I knew you were there, I was just eating food! I come see yo now! ^.^ YAYS PEOPLE" and starts to follow us.
As I suspected, he's extremely friendly, lonely, and probably very hungry. He also has tags on so I wasn't too worried anyway.
This time of year in Barre it's the town's Home Coming thing, so there's a lot of scrap food _everywhere_, so my idea was to just take him past the main place where ****-went-down and hopefully he'll find something distracting and go for it, and Chris and I can be on our way...
No such luck. Why go for **** food when these two friendly humans walk by with beef, bacon and cheese? Warm and moist yet, even, still in the wrappers just waiting to be eaten.
So we wander a long up to where we decided we were going to eat our "food" items, and he follows us the whole way. Chris opens his and while he's eating his I decide I'm going to try to figure out who this cute black, and very obediant little boy is. (I said Sit for no reason just to see and sure enough, he sat as pretty as any of my dogs ever has. He also minded "stay" pretty well.)
I whip out Chris' LED flashlight and read his tags. One was his Rabies Vac and the other was his Barre City Reg. tag. (#427)
No name though, oh well.
It should also be mentioned at this point that our boss neglected to pay this month's cell phone bill, so we can't make outgoing calls from our phones, but since we aren't over on minutes, we can still do Data stuff (IM, e-mail, mobile-web) and recieve calls.
I decide I'm going to try anyway and dial 411... No good. Ring's twice then goes silent.
About this point a cop drives by but we notice too late and he's gone... So after Chris decides that his burger is putrid, I wander down to the street to eat mine and wait for another police officer to drive by so I can attempt at getting his attention.... Chris has started tossing chunks of bacon and burger to our friend, whom we dubbed Itchy Buddy (He had da fleas pretty bad).
Chris finishes tossing his burger to Buddy and I get about half-way through with mine when Buddy decides he's bored with the little park and comes over to say hi to me. I feed him the rest of mine (It was terrible, but boy if he didn't love it.)
After he finishes with that (which took all of 4 seconds), we decide to wander back out to mainstreet and hope for more police officers.
We wander up Main Street again and a cop that Chris so affectionately referred to as "Baldy" drives by, I flag to him but he just waves at me and keeps driving.
Ugh.
About 20 seconds later an ambulance drives by. I figure maybe they can request a peace officer be sent, so I try to flag him down... No good, he just waves to me as well and continues on his merry paramedical way.
Ugh^2.
Chris and I decide we'll try to ditch our friend (who by the way minds VERY well. Anytime he'd get too close to the street for my comfort I'd say "Sidewalk buddy!" and he'd saunter back over to the middle of the sidewalk), so we go back to where all the tables, chairs, and misc. food leftovers are being stored for the night when Chris goes "Wait... Maybe there'll be someone manning the police station!" I ask him where that is and he points to a building that was about 20 feet away... I stare at him blankly for a moment, give him back his flashlight and tell him to keep Buddy company.
I jog off towards the police station and go inside. It's very small, not really a police _station_ so much as a little... middle of the town watch-out post.
Sure enough there's a female police officer sitting inside sipping on some coffee... She radios something up then asks me if I need any help. I tell her we've aquired a new friend and she smiles at me and says "There's a Sherrif out there with your friends already. He just showed up!" I smile, say thank you and jog outside.
Sure enough, Chris and Buddy and standing next to a Washington County Sheriff car. I jog back over across the street to them and the officer asks us for his Reg #, I tell him it's 427 and about that time a Barre PD pulls up behind him.
Buddy starts to get nervous about now. Two large vehicles, Chris and I, and 3 large men in uniforms with lots of clanky dangling things are kind of encroaching upon his position. I eye one of the cops to stay back because the dog was getting nervous and he does so. The sheriff gives the Barre Police officer Buddy's Reg number, gets in his Impala and drives away.
Buddy's much calmer now and Chris notices that there's a little "badge" on Buddy's collar that reads "Jack (Some Phone Number I don't Recall), Barre, VT."
I smile, say hi to Jack, he tries to lick me but I refuse. The cop takes down the phone number and gives it to dispatch and we hand Jack over to him.
He opens the back door, Jack happily jumps in and curls up on the backseat and the officers tell us "Thank you" and "Goodnight" and are off.
I feel good inside.
I just hope Jack wasn't out because his owners suck. Then I'd be sad.
I like antihistamines. Does it show much?
I'd also like to point out that I think I'm already regretting that burger, and Chris just had a rather lovely bathroom experience I'm told.
- Kev
Edit: Chris mused: "I wonder if Jack went gassy on the cops... Burger did good things for me..."
HAHA x.x;
We're sorry, Barre PD.