Made Me Laugh

[renzokuken]

Just saw this in a linux mailing list


Windows 98: n.
useless extension to a minor patch release for 32-bit extensions and
a graphical shell for a 16-bit patch to an 8-bit operating system
originally coded for a 4-bit microprocessor, written by a 2-bit
company that can't stand for 1 bit of competition.

Made me laugh anyway

[cstudent]

Your signature makes me laugh. You don't like Jack Bauer and 24 do you? :)

[renzokuken]

How did you guess? hehehe >_<

Did you know, Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect-4 in 3 moves!!!

[KaroSHiv0n]

chuck norris would kick bauers ***.

[Kernel Sanders]

chuck norris would kick bauers ***.

When Chuck Norris dives into a lake he doesnt get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris :cool:

[renzokuken]

The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.

Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the goddamned bomb was.

If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's ******* beef.

thats just some of faves......there is a list online with about 100 of em, although some suck

[DrainBead]

The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.

Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the goddamned bomb was.

If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's ******* beef.

thats just some of faves......there is a list online with about 100 of em, although some suck

Chuck Norris once challenged Jack Bauer in a "who has most testicles" contest, Chuck won by five.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjIfmRO_LHk

[rowanparker]

Would you mind sharing that list :)

[xmastree]

Who's Jack Bauer?

(Yeah, I know I could google it, but I was just making the point that I've never heard of him)

[DrainBead]

Who's Jack Bauer?

(Yeah, I know I could google it, but I was just making the point that I've never heard of him)

The star of the fiction series 24.

Portraying torture of foreign civilians as casual and neccessary since '04.

(99% of the bad guys are of course... you guessed it, Arabs.)

[K.Mandla]

Hmm.

http://xs311.xs.to/xs311/07051/ThreadHijack.jpg.xs.jpg (http://xs.to/xs.php?h=xs311&d=07051&f=ThreadHijack.jpg)

:-k

[happy-and-lost]

Hehe can't remember where the version for my sig came from :)

[Brunellus]

Hmm.

http://xs311.xs.to/xs311/07051/ThreadHijack.jpg.xs.jpg (http://xs.to/xs.php?h=xs311&d=07051&f=ThreadHijack.jpg)

:-k
concur.

[delfick]

24 is funny......jack gets shot and 20 minutes later he is fine and shooting the bad guys again......

[renzokuken]

shooting Jack doesnt hurt him, it just pisses him off

[Somenoob]

Linus Torvalds can program without a keyboard

[steven8]

Chuck Norris peddles ab machines with Christy Brinkley. How tough is that?

[renzokuken]

When life gives Jack Bauer lemons, Jack uses them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer ******* hates lemons.

Jack Bauer once armwrestled Superman. The stipulation was the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.

EDIT: may be we should get a mod to change the title of this thread - "My Hero Could Beat Your Hero" .......or something

[ironfistchamp]

Hah every year on Chuck Norris' birthday he picks one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

Not only that but the phrase "balls to the walls" is actually a description of what happens when Chuck Norris walks into a building smaller than an aircraft hanger.

I agree with the change of title. This is more fun :p

[renzokuken]

yeah, i'm enjoying this alot more.........its like "my dad could beat your dad"

Sun Tzu once wrote, "If your enemy is weaker, conquer him. If he is stronger, join him. If he is Jack Bauer, you're ******* dead."

[renzokuken]

hahaha, randomly found this one,

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice. Jack Bauer would meanwhile do something important.

If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a
bomb out of MacGyver and get out.

this is getting better, i just found this http://www.jackvschuck.com/

[ironfistchamp]

Thats nothing...When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

[renzokuken]

When in the presence of Jack Bauer, Chuck Norris pees sitting down.

[ironfistchamp]

Nothing can withstand the force of a black hole. Except Chuck Norris. He eats them. They taste like chicken.

Nuf' said!

[rowanparker]

renzokuken, you got a link for that list of Jack Bauer jokes?

[renzokuken]

of course

http://www.twentyfour.tv/jackbauer/index.php?tophundred

enjoy

[rowanparker]

of course

http://www.twentyfour.tv/jackbauer/index.php?tophundred

enjoy
Thanks but I doubt it.
Not without Curtis :(

[machoo02]

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris

[renzokuken]

Jack Bauer once played Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun.......and won!

[ironfistchamp]

Lol I've heard all your Jack ones applied to Chuck Norris first.

www.chucknorrisfacts.com

Most of em come from there.

[renzokuken]

hehe, i never noticed till the last couple of days in this thread that CHuck Norris was there first when it cam to the quotes.....oh well.......i think a fight would end in a draw anyway