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View Full Version : A better way to beat up your computer?



Bagboy23
January 26th, 2007, 04:28 PM
Does anyone know of a better way to beat up their computer? I gave mine a punch and a kick but it keeps talking back to me, embarassing me in front of my mates. :guitar:

Iarwain ben-adar
January 26th, 2007, 04:40 PM
Put it in a WaterChloride bath :cool:

(don't do this! Even if you have the faintest grasp of chemics, don't!)


Iarwain

mykalreborn
January 26th, 2007, 05:11 PM
i used to kick my monitor back when i had a really slow computer. but then i realised it wasn't the monitor's fault. it was the central unit's fault. so then i started to kick that. :D

EdThaSlayer
January 26th, 2007, 05:13 PM
Grab anything M$ related and smack your pc with it. :)
Or just throw it off the building.
If that is too extreme then just keep resetting your pc over and over again..

Mateo
January 26th, 2007, 05:19 PM
buy an large and powerful electromagnet.

Brunellus
January 26th, 2007, 05:36 PM
better security procedures and limiting physical access to the most trusted individuals only.

cezdeville
January 26th, 2007, 05:38 PM
install MS Vista, yu can't do anything worse...
:p

miseljt
January 26th, 2007, 06:32 PM
i put mine in timeout. if it keeps angering me, i'll occasionally kick it.

az
January 26th, 2007, 07:42 PM
Does anyone know of a better way to beat up their computer? I gave mine a punch and a kick but it keeps talking back to me, embarassing me in front of my mates. :guitar:

I usually try to get it to figure out something impossible. I taunt it while it goes and goes until it starts to quiver and smoke comes out of it. Then it blows up.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Return_of_the_Archons_(TOS_episode)

wert613
January 26th, 2007, 07:44 PM
i drop kick it until it breaks my foot and then threaten it with a windows cd

~LoKe
January 26th, 2007, 07:47 PM
Get a modder's hammer.

http://www.kctools.com.au/images/TOOLS/TOOL%20JPEGS/TOOL%20JPEGS%20INC%20DESCRIPTION/15025%20SLEDGE%20HAMMER.jpg

And go at it a few times in the pursuit of a custom mod.

azkehmm
January 26th, 2007, 07:48 PM
1: Hit it with a 1" waterpipe.

2: Pour gasoline over it and stick a match to it.

3: Chainsaw... 'nuf said?

4: Borrow a truck from someone and drive over it a couple of times...

5: Shoot it with a 12G shotgun (use a solid slug for the monitor)

6: Drop it off a bridge.

7: Dunk it in glycol or any other plastic dissolving chemical.

8: Do any of the above at your own risk :)

Rydel
January 26th, 2007, 07:49 PM
install MS Vista, yu can't do anything worse...
:p

Agreed. :D

Brunellus
January 26th, 2007, 07:54 PM
Get a modder's hammer.

http://www.kctools.com.au/images/TOOLS/TOOL%20JPEGS/TOOL%20JPEGS%20INC%20DESCRIPTION/15025%20SLEDGE%20HAMMER.jpg

And go at it a few times in the pursuit of a custom mod.
looks like my banhammer.

~LoKe
January 26th, 2007, 08:27 PM
looks like my banhammer.

Can I borrow it to grind up these beans to make more cups of coffee?

insane_alien
January 26th, 2007, 09:10 PM
i can loan you my coil gun. it destroys it twice,

once by the huge magnetic field and again with whatever you loaded it with travelling a couple hundered meters per second.

transactionlogfiller
January 26th, 2007, 11:05 PM
Fork bomb (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fork_bomb)

public_void
January 27th, 2007, 12:19 AM
Give it a couple of EMP's(Electromagnetic pulse (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electromagnetic_pulse))

Stew2
January 27th, 2007, 05:05 AM
Give it a couple of EMP's(Electromagnetic pulse (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electromagnetic_pulse))

I believe that is what insane_aliens coil gun does. Good for toasting laptops! :D

Regards,
Stew2

timpino
January 27th, 2007, 06:25 AM
do a prime95 torture test for a week :) in multiple instances :D

foxmulder881
January 27th, 2007, 06:35 AM
Work out why you want to bash it in the first place and fix the problem.

K.Mandla
January 27th, 2007, 09:26 AM
Why so violent, friends? If you're really that unhappy with your box, give it away ... to your enemy.

insane_alien
January 27th, 2007, 10:29 AM
I believe that is what insane_aliens coil gun does. Good for toasting laptops! :D

Regards,
Stew2

pretty much, but it uses the huge magnetic fields it creates to fire projectiles. current speeds are around 250m/s for a 1 gram projectile. only 31.25J per shot even though the caps charge up to around 2kJ. i'm working on the timing sequence just now so i can hopefully get projectile speeds above 330m/s :P

the speed was measured using audacity and a mic combined with some funky calculations.

yabbadabbadont
January 27th, 2007, 01:12 PM
BeOS included some sample videos on the install CD showing them tossing some computers off the top of a building... (OK, it may have just been monitors, but it was still cool) :D

xhaan
January 27th, 2007, 02:12 PM
I don't usually abuse my computers because I regret it later... I once punched the one I'm using now, I don't remember why I did it but it left a crack in one of the covers and whenever i see it I feel bad that I damaged my computer. :mad:

I did have a monitor that I beat the heck out of though, it was messed up and I couldn't afford a new one at the time... the color got messed up on it and it kind of turned into a weird monochrome and plus it would slowly get brighter and brighter until I couldn't see the picture anymore until I smacked it and then I'd be able to see what was going on for a while. Over time I had to hit it increasingly harder and more often until I was actually hitting the side with a hammer about every 10 minutes... it effectively quit working not long after that point.

Bagboy23
February 20th, 2007, 03:32 PM
^ Hahah that reminds me of my television back in the days when I had to connect my Amiga 600 to the TV. I bashed it about so badly it died on night.

n00b buntu
May 9th, 2007, 09:27 AM
Try my signature. Just copy and paste it into a gnome-terminal or xterm.

n00b buntu
May 9th, 2007, 09:31 AM
If you really want to let your computer have it, copy and paste this into a terminal.

*snip*

Chayak
May 9th, 2007, 09:33 AM
Well you could try my experience yesterday with a Dell Power Edge 2600. The crew of the submarine we were installing it on dropped it while it was being lowered down the hatch... the result it wouldn't power on.

steven8
May 9th, 2007, 09:33 AM
Anyone unhappy with their computer can mail it to me. I'll find it a good home.

Kujen
May 9th, 2007, 09:47 AM
Sledgehammer

zanglang
May 9th, 2007, 12:49 PM
Drive it out to a remote area, with a baseball bat, Office Space style.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQzIg0CPW5Q

ArtificialSynapse
May 9th, 2007, 02:33 PM
i used to kick my monitor back when i had a really slow computer. but then i realised it wasn't the monitor's fault. it was the central unit's fault. so then i started to kick that. :D

I used to do that too! Now my computer sits on my desk, so it's in punching distance. . . but I don't really do that anymore : P

Detonate
May 9th, 2007, 02:33 PM
I think the correct technical term is "percussive adjustment". Usually done with a BFH.

Bagboy23
May 16th, 2007, 12:22 PM
Once I punched my laptop monitor screen because I couldn't get my laptop to connectto the net, after cursing it for 20 mins, I realised the router wasn't powered on.

So nowyou see why tech support ask you if you have the power turned on... it's for people like me.