Worst day of my life

[_h_]

Today (Friday July 30 2010) has to be it. It's something we never want to experience, but it's something we have to do.

I am attending my grandfathers funeral today, who passed away last saturday on the 24th early in the morning.

So yea basically I've been a complete wreck since it happened, and the past 2 nights I have not gotten any sleep as I've been crying all night long. I couldn't even keep my composure at the wake yesterday when they did a little military service for him and played taps.

Now I get to put my grandfather to rest today in a crypt in his urn, as I am 1 of the 4 polebearers to carry him to his final resting place.

Don't know why I even made this topic, I guess I just had to give a warning to people if I seem a little off my game over the next few days, as this is my first funeral I've had to goto in my family and I've pretty much seen my grandfather everyday for the past 8 years before his passing away, so it's destroying me.

[TheNerdAL]

:( Well, he is in a better place now and may he rest in peace. :( I hope any of my close relatives don't die. :(

[heimo]

My deepest condolences. :(

[Macskeeball]

I'm sorry for your loss. Just know that the pain you feel is a sign of your love for your grandfather, and by seeing him so often you showed him that you cared. Cherish the times you had together and spend this time with the rest of your family. It may help to make something honoring his memory or to write a letter to him for you to keep (what you would say if you could).

Yeah, it hurts. :(

[epsolon77]

This may sound a bit mean, but it helped me. Don't grieve for the dead, they have no pain fear or sadness. We grieve for the living, those who have to carry on without them. While the pain is hard to bear, you must carry on and do your best to live up to his memory. I too just lost my grandmother who had a lot of tragedy in her life. She lost her youngest son in the 80's to a fire, and her husband passed a few weeks before her dead son's youngest daughter was killed in a car accident. She didn't pick herself up and move and, and because of it she died alone, and not because of a lack of effort on her families part. Honor his memory, don't grieve for your loss.

Sorry if it sounds insensitive. It's what I've learned is the truth, and I will keep you and yours in my thoughts through this tough time.

[wkhasintha]

May He RIP. It takes some time to heal.

[Dragonbite]

Sorry to hear. :(

[NMFTM]

"Death is nothing to us; for that which has been dissolved into its elements experiences no sensations, and that which has no sensation is nothing to us."

[Zorgoth]

I'm so sorry :(

It's hard to believe now, but in time you will remember the good times and keep going. In your own time, you will be ready to go on and make him proud.

[Viva]

:( Well, he is in a better place now and may he rest in peace. :( I hope any of my close relatives don't die. :(

I echo this sentiment. Rest In Peace:(

[Goolie]

Condolences. From all of us I'm sure. It doesn't mean much, but we understand, and we've all felt the crashing emotions. I remember when my gramps died. It still makes me tear 15 years later. I was still a kid, and I was in the room when he passed. =\

[oldsoundguy]

Death is the end result of life.

Your grief is understood by all that have lost a close loved one.

I took care of my parents in their latter years (for 7 1/2 years as primary care giver) Mom passed after an emergency operation and dad passed as I stood next to him.

My consolation was that they knew I loved them as I told them so and demonstrated it. That gives you peace.

Soon, it will be my turn.

[kaldor]

My grandfather was sick recently. His doctors told him he was fine and that it was just age-related sickness, blah blah. They waited too long (weeks) and he got worse and worse. Then they told him he had lung cancer from smoking.

A few days ago, he went to a cancer clinic and they gave the new results; he doesn't have lung cancer and he has prostate cancer which they could have treated and fixed before. But now it's too late because it has already spread to his bones to the point nothing can be done.

I'm very close to my grandfather. I know exactly what you feel like.

[giddyup306]

My dads dad died in '83, my moms dad in '85, my dads mom in '93, and my moms mom in '03. I'm 26 and I know the feeling all too well.

Take I don't think that there is anything any one of us can say to take away the pain, but take care, and I extend my sympathy.

[_h_]

Thanks for the support everyone. The military service funeral was amazing, and it was a gorgeous day with blue skies and warm sun to accommodate the great service.

Gave my grampa a salute through taps, and a longer salute before we left to the restaurant.

Got tons of pictures too, so lots of memories to remember.