School students: Don't you hate it when your parents try to send you to school sick?

[The Toxic Mite]

I do. This has happened to me on two occasions this week (Monday, Wednesday), and it does me head in.

On Monday, I woke up feeling ill. I told my mum about it, but she told me to get a mug of tea for myself because "it will make me better". I did, no difference. So I told my mum that I was still feeling sick. She told me to "man up and brave it", but I still complained, so she finally gave in and cancelled my taxi.

Today (Wednesday), I woke up at 03:00 GMT with a sore stomach, but I managed to get back to sleep for another couple of hours. Unfortunately, when I woke back up at 07:00 GMT, my stomach started hurting again, and I was feeling light-headed as well. I went to tell my mum, and the same thing happened again. She told me to have some tea "because I'll feel better". I refused, telling her that it won't make me better, and went back to bed. She then came in and said to me that I should just brave it and go to school. I kept complaining to her that I was feelins sick. She said that I looked fine, then threatened to confiscate my computers because "I need rest". She then went to cancel my taxi.

Seriously, that's not right at all. That is downright nasty, sending people to school sick.

I would like your opinion about this.

[baddog144]

I don't have a particular story, but yes. I do hate it. A lot. :(

[Elfy]

How many school students are likely to say no I wonder ...

How many parents are likely to say no to skew the poll ...

:lol:

[lisati]

It has been a long time since I went to school, let alone having to cope with being sent there sick. I did, however, get sent to school with a broken arm for a week before it was x-rayed and they realised I wasn't trying to pull a fast one.

[The Toxic Mite]

How many school students are likely to say no I wonder ...

How many parents are likely to say no to skew the poll ...

:lol:

Pretty good observation... :?

[Elfy]

Pretty good observation... :?

I try ...

then again I wonder how many parents go to work sick - so all in all sending kids to school when they are feeling a bit under the weather is good training for the rest of their lives :D

[audiomick]

What can I say? My mum was a nurse; she always knew if I was really sick or not...

[frup]

With out seeing how sick you were I agree with your mum. The fact is I would work through how you are feeling, and I could take a paid sick day!

I remember when I was school the slightest cold and I would be getting a day off, (I never really took more than 6 days off a year though) I work through the same symptoms with out a thought... The only time I would take a day off is when I think I may infect my work colleagues. I haven't had anything that I would describe as contagious though.

Go get really drunk and go to school with a mad as hangover, you'll never be sick from school again :D

But yeah, from the way you described it, you don't sound that sick. Manning up and braving it is an important skill to learn.

Your mum is clearly frustrated by the amount of time you are spending on your computers and concerned that this may be affecting your health (which it can)... From her point of view she probably thinks you not getting enough sleep etc. has caused you to feel this way. From that perspective, it's your own fault really.

I do hope you aren't that sick for your own sake too. If you are very sick I am sorry for these unnecessary comments and wish you a quick recovery.

With out knowing what's been going on (Its like looking through a crack) it seems like you need to talk to your mum more (not whining about how sick you feel) but to understand her reasoning behind why you need to man up/brave it etc. She may have a good reason for it.

Also why do you take a taxi? The idea of people taking a taxi to school is rather odd where I'm from, but then again I only walked 3 kilometres to high school.

[The Toxic Mite]

I try ...

then again I wonder how many parents go to work sick - so all in all sending kids to school when they are feeling a bit under the weather is good training for the rest of their lives :D

My mum only works Mondays and Fridays. I'm at a legal age to stay in the house while everyone else is out.

I think it's counter-productive, being at school sick, because you're unable to concentrate on the stuff you're working on. Parents, on the other hand, think that it's counter-productive staying off school. Why? :?

[The Toxic Mite]

With out seeing how sick you were I agree with your mum. The fact is I would work through how you are feeling, and I could take a paid sick day!

I remember when I was school the slightest cold and I would be getting a day off, (I never really took more than 6 days off a year though) I work through the same symptoms with out a thought... The only time I would take a day off is when I think I may infect my work colleagues. I haven't had anything that I would describe as contagious though.

Go get really drunk and go to school with a mad as hangover, you'll never be sick from school again :D

But yeah, from the way you described it, you don't sound that sick. Manning up and braving it is an important skill to learn.

Your mum is clearly frustrated by the amount of time you are spending on your computers and concerned that this may be affecting your health (which it can)... From her point of view she probably thinks you not getting enough sleep etc. has caused you to feel this way. From that perspective, it's your own fault really.

I do hope you aren't that sick for your own sake too. If you are very sick I am sorry for these unnecessary comments and wish you a quick recovery.

With out knowing what's been going on (Its like looking through a crack) it seems like you need to talk to your mum more (not whining about how sick you feel) but to understand her reasoning behind why you need to man up/brave it etc. She may have a good reason for it.

Also why do you take a taxi? The idea of people taking a taxi to school is rather odd where I'm from, but then again I only walked 3 kilometres to high school.

First, I completely disagree with you. I don't spend ALL the time on the computer. I've got a pretty good sleep pattern.

Second, I take a taxi because I live outside the catchment area, and because I'm autistic.

[KiwiNZ]

Because Parents and forum Admins are evil:p ;) :)

[audiomick]

I think it's counter-productive, being at school sick, because you're unable to concentrate on the stuff you're working on. Parents, on the other hand, think that it's counter-productive staying off school. Why? :?

Well if you really are sick, it is better to give yourself time to get well, and if it is something contagious, you don't want to infect the rest of the school.

If you are just feeling a bit unwell, I can understand your mum to an extent. Any day you miss at school is gone; they don't go back and repeat the class work just because you weren't there, you have to catch up with it yourself.

Much more important, as far as I see it, is why you are feeling unwell. If you just had a bad night, well, that happens. And as others have already said, to an extent you just have to tough it out. If you are regularly having problems, you need to find out why. It doesn't have to mean there is something wrong with you, it might mean you are doing something wrong. Things like diet, regular sleeping hours or not, how much exercise you get and such make a huge difference to how you feel.

[frup]

First, I completely disagree with you. I don't spend ALL the time on the computer. I've got a pretty good sleep pattern.

Second, I take a taxi because I live outside the catchment area, and because I'm autistic.

Like I said, I can only assume through what you've told us. The fact that your mum commented on your computer usage would indicate the from her perspective it may be too much. It doesn't necessarily mean it is too much, it's just perspective. The reason I posted was to point out the perspective not to insult or criticise you, mediation requires compromise from all sides.

The hope is that you can see it from your mums point of view, or understand where she is coming from.

When I was 15 I was pretty pig headed. I often felt my mum was fighting against me to some extent, but as I grew older I realised I was more the one fighting against her. Through out that period I was much more self-absorbed than I am now and situations that affected me were much more important to me than how they affected others. To put it frankly, I didn't stop to think about other peoples points of view.

The taxi comment was merely out of curiosity. It makes complete sense now, thank you for sharing.

Is a catchment area a school bus area or a zone or what? It's a phrase I'm unfamiliar with in this context.

[The Toxic Mite]

Like I said, I can only assume through what you've told us. The fact that your mum commented on your computer usage would indicate the from her perspective it may be too much. It doesn't necessarily mean it is too much, it's just perspective. The reason I posted was to point out the perspective not to insult or criticise you, mediation requires compromise from all sides.

The hope is that you can see it from your mums point of view, or understand where she is coming from.

When I was 15 I was pretty pig headed. I often felt my mum was fighting against me to some extent, but as I grew older I realised I was more the one fighting against her. Through out that period I was much more self-absorbed than I am now and situations that affected me were much more important to me than how they affected others. To put it frankly, I didn't stop to think about other peoples points of view.

The taxi comment was merely out of curiosity. It makes complete sense now, thank you for sharing.

Is a catchment area a school bus area or a zone or what? It's a phrase I'm unfamiliar with in this context.

She didn't comment on my computer usage at all, she only threatened to confiscate my computers.

BTW, the catchment area is where the school buses are meant to be going to pick pupils up. My town is out of the catchment area because there's a high school there. If you ask why I don't go to that school, it's because it's crap.

[dE_logics]

Man those school days...been 2 years.

[matthew.ball]

My parents never really made me go to school, though I did always go to school.

Maybe I'm very lucky (healthy?) but I don't think I missed a day of school during the later years of high-school and college. Even if you can't "think" (congested head or whatever) you can always take notes and just revise them when you're feeling better.

I don't think schools post their lecture slides on the net (like a university does), so if you miss a day of school, you miss the whole lot.

I'm very pro education though, so that probably has to do a lot with where I'm coming from.

[frup]

She didn't comment on my computer usage at all, she only threatened to confiscate my computers.


ok, too much assuming on my behalf, it's late at night where I am and far too hot.

But it still creates the question of why she would do that. Her actions make me assume that she thinks your computer usage is too high, or that it has a negative impact on you, so she wants to take it away because you are sick and not wanting to go to school. Do you see a large inconsistency in the correlations I am forming?

Of course the other way of looking at it is just that you like computers so when you are "naughty" she takes them away as punishment.

My mum threatened to take away my computers, and regularly did take away the router or mice and keyboards. It was a punishment for being badly behaved but it was also because she thought I used the computer too much. I definitely did (though I didn't think so at the time). Somehow this became such that a lot of arguments (as you do at that age) would end up talking about my computer usage... the peek which would have been 2-3 hours per day and maybe 6 hours on weekends, this is including homework, assignments, reading the news, socialising etc. I know a lot have even higher usages... but again, perspective :D

I'm one of those people who the more time I spent on my computer, the less well I did in school. That really frustrated my mum.

[audiomick]

She didn't comment on my computer usage at all, she only threatened to confiscate my computers.

You wrote this

then threatened to confiscate my computers because "I need rest"There is no way we can judge, other than what you write, and that is coming from your point of view, so it may not be really objective.

Bear in mind, please, that the following is in no way intended to accuse anyone, either you or your mum, of anything. It is just the way things look from what you have written.

To me, it looks like one of two things. You will have to have a think about it and decide for yourself which is more likely.
Maybe your mum just knows that your computer is important to you and is trying to get a lever on you. That implies that your mum may be feeling frustrated and feeling that you are often unco-operative, for whatever reason.

Maybe your mum really is concerned about how much time you are spending on the computer. She hasn't said so directly, but that fact that she referred to the computer at all will have had a reason. Don't forget, it is easily possible, maybe even probable, that your mum has a very different idea about what "too much time" on the computer means to what you do.

[gsmanners]

Bit of rant, but I hate it when parents send their sick kids to school. Especially the parents who are obsessed with perfect attendence. They turn the schools into plague-ridden hell-holes.

[XubuRoxMySox]

Not an issue for home school. I voted "no," because I can do all my schoolwork in my PJs. So unless I'm too sick to sit in front of a computer with my books and worksheets, there's nothing to prevent me from getting it all done. And in less than half the time it takes my government-schooled friends to get the same (usually lesser) amount of work done.

-Robin

[t0p]

When I was a kid, my parents usually sent me to school if I said I was ill. They'd relent only if I really looked sick. But most of the time when I claimed to be too sick to go to school, I wasn't really that ill. Round here we call it "swinging the lead".

OP, are you sure you weren't just swinging the lead? You say you were too sick to go to school on Monday and Wednesday. So you were ill on monday, got better on tuesday, then got a different illness on Wednesday? Or is it the same illness, but for some mysterious reason the symptons subsided for a day? Hmm...

On the limited info we've been given, and not being able to see how you look, I'm guessing that you weren't actually too ill to go to school. We all sometimes wake up feeling a little rough, and when I was at university I often decided I felt "too rough to go to lectures" and stayed in bed. That's something we all can do when we have left home and fend for ourselves. But when we are parents, we are responsible for our children and their schooling. In the past, when my stepchildren claimed they were "too ill to go to school", their mother and I decided whether they actually looked ill. When someone really does feel that ill, they look pretty rough. If they didn't look that rough they went to school.

Another thing, OP: on Monday, how long did you feel ill? Were you better by midday? 6pm? Or were you still ill when you went to bed Monday evening? If you felt better before the time school ends, I would guess you weren't that ill in the first place.

[Barrucadu]

I'm the opposite; I dislike being kept away from school. I'm lazy and don't do much work at home, so school is the best place for me becasue otherwise I'll just procrastinate everything.
So, I tend to go to school unless I've lost the ability to walk or something…

[SoFl W]

You poor baby.

Whenever I said I was sick my mother would kick my @$$ out the door and tell me I would feel better when I got to school.


She was right.

[ubunterooster]

+1 dixiedancer
Homeschooling leaves little room for being sick altering plans.
With my leg, there's no way I'd go to school, but still had to do my work.