The most embarrassing thing in the entire world

[Tiiba]

Everyone knows that the Internet is for porn. Porn is big business in general. That's pretty embarrassing. But if you really want to embarrass humanity in front of the whole galaxy, just show them what videos are popular on YouTube. "Charlie bit my finger - again!" is #1. "Hahaha" is #4.

So here we are. TV stations spend untold millions trying to make their broadcasts cool, interesting, professional, and what people really want is to look at babies.

[regala]

Everyone knows that the Internet is for porn. Porn is big business in general. That's pretty embarrassing. But if you really want to embarrass humanity in front of the whole galaxy, just show them what videos are popular on YouTube. "Charlie bit my finger - again!" is #1. "Hahaha" is #4.

So here we are. TV stations spend untold millions trying to make their broadcasts cool, interesting, professional, and what people really want is to look at babies.

get over it, there are nearly 7 billion people down here. obviously you will find morons in such a big bunch. and don't forget the fact that a very large group of not-so-clueless human beings won't take any part in any vote, or won't linger on youtube for 16 hours a day.
what this chart tells is that moronic individuals browsing all day long on youtube loves looking at babies. Doesn't look that bad to me :)

[Entropy_Sam]

Yep. Bear in mind that YouTube video rankings (and the braindead comments people leave) don't necessarily tell you about humanity as a whole, they tell you about the cross-section of humanity that most uses YouTube.

Does porn really have to be embarrasing? What it all boils down to is that no matter how much we believe otherwise, we're still slaves to our base instincts (and therefore we find sex appealing). I should hope so too, seeing as those base instincts are what keeps the species propagating. The fact that porn is such big business merely reflects that.

No shame there, IMO. It's a natural human fixation. Any negative reaction is over-prudish, and loses sight of our true nature.

That said, all things are only healthy in moderation.

EDIT: OTOH, the OP is right, though. I'd be embarrassed to show an Alien ambassador some of the more popular YouTube videos and internet memes.

[Tibuda]

Everyone knows that the Internet is for porn.

Not, it is not. You can use it only for porn, but many people don't.

[Kingsley]

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/abstraction.png

[jayze]

:lolflag:
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/abstraction.png

[madnessjack]

YouTube is full of carp anyway!

[mikkie]

No pr0n, no InternetZ! It is simple as that.

[samh785]

YouTube is full of carp anyway!
magikarp

[JDShu]

mmmm... carp

[Tristam Green]

magikarp

**** yeah SEAKING

[ratcheer]

YouTube is full of carp anyway!

That is funny!

Tim

[xuCGC002]

YouTube is full of carp anyway!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgkNaiXNRO4

[etnlIcarus]

Everyone knows that the Internet is for porn. Porn is big business in general. That's pretty embarrassing. But if you really want to embarrass humanity in front of the whole galaxy, just show them what videos are popular on YouTube. "Charlie bit my finger - again!" is #1. "Hahaha" is #4.

So here we are. TV stations spend untold millions trying to make their broadcasts cool, interesting, professional, and what people really want is to look at babies.

I don't get it. What's embarrassing about porn? Are we anticipating that the galaxy is largely Catholic, or our parents?

[madnessjack]

**** yeah SEAKING
Er, Gyarados I believe

[Sporkman]

Are we anticipating that the galaxy is largely Catholic, or our parents?

Do catholics have a problem with porn?

[Grenage]

Do catholics have a problem with porn?

I think they have a problem with most things...

(waits for admin Hammer of Smite)

[Sporkman]

I think they have a problem with most things...

(waits for admin Hammer of Smite)

I dunno, pretty close to 100% of the girls I've dated have been catholic...

[Grenage]

Masturbation and sex before marriage, they're Catholic 'nonos'.

[ticopelp]

Don't be so full of yourself. If your parents didn't love children, you probably wouldn't be here today.

Also, Youtube isn't a TV station or a news broadcast platform. It's a place for people to share videos about themselves; essentially a time-waster. The "morons" are using the service as intended.

That said, I have Youtube comments turned off, because they too frequently challenge the faith I have in humanity. ;)

[Sporkman]

Masturbation and sex before marriage, they're Catholic 'nonos'.

Heh heh...

[MooPi]

YouTube is full of carp anyway!
But I find great Carp all over the intertoobs. I did get hooked into watching Pink spin water over all the Gramy guests on YouTube. Smokin'

[Cabs21]

I feel as though since YouTube does not allow porn on there site then the most popular video results are a bit skewed. The current #1 video would be much lower in the ranks if porn was allowed on the site also. Just a thought.

[kayvortex]

You wanna know a worse thought? Maybe we're the most advanced life form in the universe. Now isn't that a terrifying thought.

[Grenage]

You wanna know a worse thought? Maybe we're the most advanced life form in the universe. Now isn't that a terrifying thought.

It just means we wouldn't need to worry about alien ships blowing up [insert landmark]. I can live with this.

[Tristam Green]

Er, Gyarados I believe

lrn2internets

[madnessjack]

lrn2internets
getalife

[kayvortex]

It just means we wouldn't need to worry about alien ships blowing up [insert landmark]. I can live with this.

Yeah, but what happens when our ambassadorial star ship's left engine stalls and accidentally crashes into their equivalent of our [insert massively significant cultural landmark]?

I wouldn't want to be the one who has to say to their president, "Well, what did you expect? Have you seen what's popular on YouTube!"

[Tristam Green]

getalife

says the guy showing me his pokeymans

[LightB]

You also have to keep in mind most youtube users are 13. Most of you would be lucky to be as intelligent as the charlie bit my finger crowd at that age.

[LightB]

I don't get it. What's embarrassing about porn? Are we anticipating that the galaxy is largely Catholic, or our parents?

I don't care about porn, but I'd guess some assume the galaxy is filled with married drones who believe their way is the way.

[schauerlich]

The internet is for porn, it's only natural that we'd want to observe the consequences as well.

[koenn]

... YouTube ...

So here we are. TV stations spend untold millions trying to make their broadcasts cool, interesting, professional, ...

don't know where you live, but down here, we have TV stations showing YouTube compilations. Go figure.

[RabbitWho]

YouTube is full of carp anyway!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKTLrP8zExU

First I thought it was my dyslexia, but I checked, and you actually said carp.

[MickS]

Nothing wrong with YouTube, there is loads of rubbish but there is lots of good stuff too, better than my local TV.


Mick

[Tiiba]

Nothing wrong with YouTube, there is loads of rubbish but there is lots of good stuff too, better than my local TV.


Mick

No, YouTube is fine. There are tutorials on neural networks there. And I don't mind that others want to see one toddler bite another. It's just embarrassing.

[etnlIcarus]

Man, not feeling the love for Catholicism in this thread. :'(
Don't be so full of yourself. If your parents didn't love children, you probably wouldn't be here today.
wut


Oh and I call for the posting of our favourite channels/videos, in the name of defending youboob.

http://www.youtube.com/user/UppruniTegundanna -- check out, "Reverse engineering the universe", and, "The Ultimate Rube Goldberg Machine"
http://www.youtube.com/user/SagansCosmos
http://www.youtube.com/user/potholer54
http://www.youtube.com/user/misterdeity -- pants-wettingly funny
http://www.youtube.com/user/jaybobed -- pant-wettingly high-calorie
http://www.youtube.com/user/sxephil

[SuperSonic4]

Man, not feeling the love for Catholicism in this thread. :'(
wut


When the Catholic Church stops it's active participation in the propagation of HIV/AIDS, properly punishes the clergy who have commit unspeakable crimes against children in secular law, stops telling gays they are lesser citizens based solely on sexual orientation, fights laws on equality and comes into the modern world then I'll stop protesting against it

[xuCGC002]

When the Catholic Church stops it's active participation in the propagation of HIV/AIDS, properly punishes the clergy who have commit unspeakable crimes against children in secular law, stops telling gays they are lesser citizens based solely on sexual orientation, fights laws on equality and comes into the modern world then I'll stop protesting against it

Religion? In my UF?

[LightB]

When the Catholic Church stops it's active participation in the propagation of HIV/AIDS, properly punishes the clergy who have commit unspeakable crimes against children in secular law, stops telling gays they are lesser citizens based solely on sexual orientation, fights laws on equality and comes into the modern world then I'll stop protesting against it

Not to mention the fact that they're committing heinous sacrilege against Pastafarianism, the one True Faith.

[Dark Aspect]

That said, all things are only healthy in moderation.


Under that flawed way of thinking - It would be ok to kill you, as long as I don't kill too many people.

To the OP, if you bored install Arch Linux in place of the pile of crap that is Ubuntu 9.10.

[SuperSonic4]

to the op, if you bored install arch linux in place of the pile of crap that is ubuntu 9.10.

+1

*chucks flameproof suit*

[Dayofswords]

i seriously have no idea how charlie became number one, its not even funny

youtube is nothing, show the galaxy 4chan and we will be shunned

[etnlIcarus]

I love how a joke has escalated to the point of people mounting their favourite soapbox. Not that I disagree but this is why we can't have nice things. Now post youtube links or STFU. :P

[matthew.ball]

Are we anticipating that the galaxy is largely Catholic [...]
Wow, that was such an unexpected response, I love it.

[etnlIcarus]

Sarcasm?

[kk0sse54]

To the OP, if you bored install Arch Linux in place of the pile of crap that is Ubuntu 9.10.

Why, why, why did you have to mention the unmentionable?


Not to mention the fact that they're committing heinous sacrilege against Pastafarianism, the one True Faith.
You sir just made my day :D

Back on topic though (sort of), I find youtube just annoying and rarely frequent it, but it doesn't make me lose faith in humanity. I already lost that a long time ago ;)

[沸かされた魚の人は猫を舐]

I don't care about porn, but I'd guess some assume the galaxy is filled with married drones who believe their way is the way.

Unless you are lacking a phallus, congratulations on being better than the rest of your gender.

[Megrimn]

don't forget the "'charlie bit me' autotune" thing


ohhhhhh, ahhhhhhh, oooooowwww, charlie/that really huuuuurt

[matthew.ball]

Sarcasm?
Nah man, it's great. I don't know, it's UF - definitely don't expect wit of that calibre.

[etnlIcarus]

Right on... I think.

[madnessjack]

First I thought it was my dyslexia, but I checked, and you actually said carp.
Yeah, I'm actually trying to cut down on swearing! New Years resolution and all that.


says the guy showing me his pokeymans
:P

[Entropy_Sam]

Yeah, but what happens when our ambassadorial star ship's left engine stalls and accidentally crashes into their equivalent of our [insert massively significant cultural landmark]?

I wouldn't want to be the one who has to say to their president, "Well, what did you expect? Have you seen what's popular on YouTube!"


Actually, a more pressing concern is that the alien ambassador might deliberately crash into one of our famous landmarks - if they've been watching us, they can probably see from Youtube and similar that it's an extremely popular move to make. Like a great big galactic electric handshake.

[Viva]

All those atheists drooling over Richard Dawkins' videos on youtube](*,)

[etnlIcarus]

The 2010 Blasphemy Challenge has been cancelled. In it's stead, we will be holding the 2010 Drooling Challenge. All volume measurements must conform to metric standards.

[clanky]

Everyone knows that the Internet is for porn. Porn is big business in general. That's pretty embarrassing. But if you really want to embarrass humanity in front of the whole galaxy, just show them what videos are popular on YouTube. "Charlie bit my finger - again!" is #1. "Hahaha" is #4.

So here we are. TV stations spend untold millions trying to make their broadcasts cool, interesting, professional, and what people really want is to look at babies.

Don't worry, the aliens will be too busy watching alien porn to notice.

[Tristam Green]

Don't worry, the aliens will be too busy watching alien porn to notice.

Seriously - the OP must not realize that in the year 3000, the aliens of Omicron Persei 8 will descend upon us, demanding to see the season finale of Single Female Lawyer.

[Sporkman]

Seriously - the OP must not realize that in the year 3000, the aliens of Omicron Persei 8 will descend upon us, demanding to see the season finale of Single Female Lawyer.

Harvest his human horn!....his lower horn... :twisted:

[kayvortex]

Actually, a more pressing concern is that the alien ambassador might deliberately crash into one of our famous landmarks - if they've been watching us, they can probably see from Youtube and similar that it's an extremely popular move to make. Like a great big galactic electric handshake.

GOD DAMN YOU COLIN PILLINGEEERRRR (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beagle_2)!!! DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!! (Cue panning shot revealing the half-submerged Statue of Liberty).

Anyway, back to topic...I for one am looking forward to enjoying the next fifty or so years of technological and physical achievement before creationists, extremists and conspiracists roam the nascent post-apocalyptic world cajoling the idiotic masses with unnerving ease, who just happen to share their own ideology due to geographic location, into beating two sh_ts into, not only each other but mainly into, the ideas and principles that once separated us from above-average intelligent fungi. Or, whatever...

[Tristam Green]

Harvest his human horn!....his lower horn... :twisted:

http://preparetoenteraworldofpain.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/hypnotoad2.gif

All glory to the Hypnotoad!

[lisati]

Not to mention the fact that they're committing heinous sacrilege against Pastafarianism, the one True Faith.
Sounds a bit suspect to me.....so many groups claiming to be "the one true faith". Oh no! They can't all be right! (insert assorted rants) There's a bomb in my head!!!!!!

(That feels better, having had a vent!) :)


The 2010 Blasphemy Challenge has been cancelled. In it's stead, we will be holding the 2010 Drooling Challenge. All volume measurements must conform to metric standards.
Now this is something that sounds like it has the potential for embarrassing the participants!