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Thread: Phone scam

  1. #21
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    Re: Phone scam

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Daisy View Post
    That's the one.
    I read that thread too. Lucky I did, because I received one of those calls about a month ago and was well prepared. Wish I had recorded it. Rats. Oh well... It went something like this:

    Scammer (thick accent): I'm calling from Microsoft technical support company because you have a virus on your Windows computer.
    Me: Eh? I didn't catch that. Can you speak more slowly?
    Scammer: I'm... calling... from... Microsoft... technical... support... company... because... you... have... a... virus... on... your... Windows... computer.
    Me: I couldn't understand you. You have a very thick accent. Could you repeat that?
    Scammer: YOU... HAVE... A... VIRUS!
    Me: Oh. I have a virus? Nonsense. I'm perfectly healthy.
    Scammer: NO. ON YOUR COMPUTER!
    Me: Why are you yelling at me? Is this how you treat customers?
    Scammer: Sorry. You have a computer virus.
    Me: A computer virus? Where did you say you were from?
    Scammer: (fuming): I am from Microsoft technical support company.
    Me: Microsoft? You're from Microsoft?
    Scammer (very frustrated): Microsoft technical support company.
    Me: So you're an employee of Microsoft?
    Scammer: No. We are support company.
    Me: So you're not from Microsoft?
    Scammer: WE ARE MICROSOFT SUPPORT COMPANY.
    Me: I don't understand. First, you're from Microsoft, then you're not from Microsoft, then you are again. Don't you know where you work?
    Scammer: YOU HAVE A WINDOWS VIRUS!
    Me: I have a Windows virus? How do you know?
    Scammer: Your computer is telling us that it has a virus.
    Me: I still don't understand you. Your accent is very thick.
    Scammer: YOUR... COMPUTER... IS... TELLING... US... IT... HAS... A... VIRUS.
    Me: My computer is telling you?
    Scammer: Yes. It is telling us.
    Me: Who told it to tell you?
    Scammer (exasperated): It is telling us that you have a virus!
    Me: But I didn't tell you.
    Scammer: YOUR COMPUTER IS TELLING US!
    Me: But I didn't tell my computer to tell.
    Scammer: We have REPORTS here that you have a virus!
    Me: Where did you say the reports come from?
    Scammer: YOUR COMPUTER!
    Me: My computer is sending reports to you?
    Scammer: YES!!!
    Me: To Microsoft?
    Scammer: To US!
    Me: And you're Microsoft?
    Scammer: WE... ARE... MICROSOFT... SUPPORT... COMPANY!!!!
    Me: I don't understand why you can't just give me a simple answer. Am I speaking to Microsoft?
    Scammer (long silence): We. Are. Support. Company.
    Me: Ohhh! You're a support company! Not Microsoft?
    Scammer (even longer silence): Microsoft. Support. Company.
    Me: So you are getting reports from my computer?
    Scammer: You. Have. Virus.
    Me: You mean MICROSOFT IS SPYING ON ME?!
    Scammer: WE HAVE REPORT OF BAD VIRUS!! YOU DON'T CARE?
    Me: Why is Microsoft spying on me? Are you really from Microsoft or are you from the CIA?
    Scammer: I HOPE YOU GET &$%#)%*! VIRUS ON YOUR *)%#^^(&$#@% COMPUTER #$#%#)(*&%^!!!
    Me: I don't understand what you are saying. Your accent really is very thick. Microsoft should pay for English lessons.
    <click>
    Newb: How far must I jump to clear the ledge halfway down?
    Guru: It's bad to jump off cliffs. Let's look at better options.
    Newb: Stop harping about "best practices" and just tell me.


  2. #22
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    Re: Phone scam

    I always wanted some phone scammers to play with (pout) Why don't they ever call me?
    Last edited by duke.tim; March 2nd, 2013 at 09:26 AM.
    User:To friend or not to friend--that is the question:
    Whether 'tis nobler to take an arrow to the knee or to suffer
    the slights and add's of outrageous fortune
    Or to take arms against a sea of trolls And by opposing feed them. www.evicsis.com

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
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    Porirua, New Zealand
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    Re: Phone scam

    Mrs Lisati took a call like this some months back. Even though she's not particularly tech-savvy, she sensed that something wasn't right and politely told them where to go and hung up on them.
    Forum DOs and DON'Ts
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  4. #24
    Join Date
    May 2008
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    Ubuntu 12.04 Precise Pangolin

    Re: Phone scam

    Quote Originally Posted by DuckHook View Post
    Wish I had recorded it. Rats. Oh well... It went something like this..
    Absolutely brilliant! I wish you had recorded it!
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