hope it's ok to post a joke......

[squakie]

A very young man in his early 20's gets up each morning, gets dressed and has a terrible headache until he comes home, changes his clothes and goes to bed.

After a month of these terrible headaches, he goes to a doctor and tells the doctor what's been going on. The doctor runs some tests, then tells the young man that his testicles are pushing on his spine and that's what's giving him the headaches. The young man asks the doctor what can be done and is told they will need to be removed. Well, the young man runs out of the doctors office!

After another month, the young man returns and says to do the surgery as he can't stand the headaches any longer. So he has the surgery and it takes him a couple of months to get past it.

Feeling good, he walks downtown and decides he is going to get a new suit. He walks in to the clothing store and a real elderly man greets him and asks him what he would like. The young man tells him he wants a new suit, and the elderly man says 42 long, 36" waist, 32" inseam. The young man is amazed and asks how he knew that, to which the elderly man replies he's been doing this 60 years.

The young man then tells him he'd like a shirt. Again, the elderly man says 14 1/2 neck, 30" sleeves. Again the young man is amazed and asks how he knew that, to which the elderly replies again that he's been doing this for 60 years.

The young man then says he can get the elderly man with this: he wants new underwear. The elderly man replies 36, to which the young man says I got you there - I've been wearing 34's all my life.

The elderly man replies you don't want to do that - it will make your testicles press on your spine and give you a terrible headache!

Moral of the story: If you have a bad headache, check your undies first.

[Pand5461]

- Holmes, how are you so familiar with those muons, protons, gluons?
- It's elementary, my dear Watson!

[squakie]

I've GOT to remember that one!

[CK000]

Here is another Sherlock Holmes joke:-

Holmes and Watson are out late at night. Suddenly Sherlock says "Watson, what can you see?"

Watson says, "I can see lots of stars and the moon too."

"So, tell me, what can you deduce from that?" replies Holmes.

"Well I can marvel at the wonders of the universe..." replies Watson.

"Yes, Watson and you can also realise some-one has stolen Our tent!"

[greatsirkain]

radio transmission A:
"Unidentified vessel please acknowledge, you are on an intercept course"
radio transmission B:
"caution, you are on an intercept course please divert now"
radio transmission A:
"Acknowledged intercept course, change your heading immediately!"
radio transmission B:
"This is a united states warship, this is your final warning! Divert your course now!"
radio transmission A:
"....this is a lighthouse, your call bud"

[Bucky Ball]

Grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'We've got a drink named after you!' Grasshopper says, 'What, Jeff?'

Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, 'Why the long face?'

[squakie]

Bada bing!

[haqking]

Geek jokes:

F(x)= sin(x) walks into a restaurant and
orders some soup. The waiter replies, "Sorry
but we don't cater for functions here.

Somebody guessed my password, so I had to rename my dog.

A geek walks into a party with a parrot on his shoulder, the parrot occasionally stretches it's wings and squawks "pieces of seven pieces of seven". An attractive young lady appears fascinated by the pair and finally walks over to the pair.
She looks first at the parrot and then at the geek and says "Why does your parrot keep saying pieces of seven, shouldn't it be pieces of eight?"
To which the geek replies "yeah its a parroty error"

man walks into a bar, says "ouch"

[CK000]

A man walks into a public house with a newt on his shoulder and orders a pint of beer;
The barman says "You do realise you have a newt on your shoulder do you not?"
"Yes, he is my pet" says the man.
"What do you call him then?"
"Tiny" says the man.
"Why do you call him tiny?"
"Because he is minute of course!"