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Thread: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    Dawlish, Devon, UK
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    592
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    Kubuntu 14.04 Trusty Tahr

    Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    Sometimes I see posts and have to figuratively 'bite my tongue' to prevent an unhelpful response. But these are some of the things I am tempted to say.

    Q. Can I delete Ubuntu and go back to Windows?
    A. No I'm sorry, but now you have Ubuntu on your hard drive it is impossible to revert back. You will have to purchase a new hard drive. As you have Ubuntu installed on your computer, you will also have to send $50 per month to the Free Software Foundation to avoid prosecution. This will be for the rest of your life.

    Q. I am having a problem with Unbuntu/Ubunut/various mispellings...
    A. I am sorry, this forum is for Ubuntu users only. Try the Unbuntu/Ubunut/various mispellings forum instead.

    Q. What is this Ubuntu thing?
    A. Ubuntu is a Windows virus which will burn your hard drive like the olympic torch. It will also persuade Facebook to demolish your house, have sex with your partner and make your kids fail their exams. As you have visited this forum, you now have the virus on your computer.

    Q. Ubuntu sux! Windows rools etc. etc....
    A. You are dribbling into your mash and your incontinence pad needs changing. The red button will call the nurse.

    Q. I installed Ubuntu and now Windows won't boot up....
    A. You have chosen the red pill. Welcome, you have escaped from The Matrix.
    $> cd /pub
    $> more beer

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    London, England
    Beans
    6,705
    Distro
    Ubuntu Development Release

    Re: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    Q. I thought forums were for getting answers.
    A. No. Forums exist for YOU to answer questions.
    It is a machine. It is more stupid than we are. It will not stop us from doing stupid things.
    Ubuntu user #33,200. Linux user #530,530


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Arizona USA
    Beans
    249
    Distro
    Ubuntu 12.04 Precise Pangolin

    Re: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    I like to say "bite my keyboard" but some people don't get it.

    The opposite of you are the people that should keep their fingers off the keys but feel the need to comment on things that they have no knowledge of.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Indiana
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    1,933
    Distro
    Hardy Heron (Ubuntu Development)

    Re: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    Quote Originally Posted by timgood View Post
    Q. Can I delete Ubuntu and go back to Windows?
    A. No I'm sorry, but now you have Ubuntu on your hard drive it is impossible to revert back. You will have to purchase a new hard drive. As you have Ubuntu installed on your computer, you will also have to send $50 per month to the Free Software Foundation to avoid prosecution. This will be for the rest of your life.
    Lol. Hey, you agreed to the terms of the GPL. Didn't you read it all?

    Quote Originally Posted by timgood View Post
    Q. I am having a problem with Unbuntu/Ubunut/various mispellings...
    A. I am sorry, this forum is for Ubuntu users only. Try the Unbuntu/Ubunut/various mispellings forum instead.
    Ubunut is my favorite. I'm thinking about having an ubunutbutter and jelly sandwich for lunch.

    But honestly, there have probably been many times that I didn't bite my tongue that I should have. Only in the Cafe, of course.
    Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You. - Dr. Seuss

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Beans
    1,419

    Re: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    Quote Originally Posted by forrestcupp View Post

    But honestly, there have probably been many times that I didn't bite my tongue that I should have. Only in the Cafe, of course.
    You and me both. On the other hand, there is an issue regarding questions in the "help" sections of Ubuntu Forums that pops up so frequently (particularly, it seems, in the gaming section) that I finally added a signature line to my profile to address it, so I wouldn't have to type it into every response I make.
    If you are asking about a problem with your system, make sure to give details about your setup. OTHERWISE, NO ONE CAN HELP YOU.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Indiana
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    Hardy Heron (Ubuntu Development)

    Re: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    Quote Originally Posted by thatguruguy View Post
    You and me both. On the other hand, there is an issue regarding questions in the "help" sections of Ubuntu Forums that pops up so frequently (particularly, it seems, in the gaming section) that I finally added a signature line to my profile to address it, so I wouldn't have to type it into every response I make.
    That ruins an easy way to run your post count up.
    Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You. - Dr. Seuss

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Beans
    Hidden!
    Distro
    Lubuntu Development Release

    Re: Things I have to stop myself from saying...

    Sometimes I see posts and have to figuratively 'bite my tongue' to prevent an unhelpful response. But these are some of the things I am tempted to say.
    Slight correction:

    Q. $(SOFTWARE) sux! $(OTHER_SOFTWARE) rools etc. etc....


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