The "Corrupt a wish" game

[Eddy Gordo from Tekken]

Granted: you are abducted by aliens who probe you a few times then put that black oil in your eyes. You and that prick Krycek become allies, while you wait for Mulder and Scully to FINALLY just kiss so they can ease the romantic tension and finally find you and save you from the probing...but they won't kiss, so enjoy the probing.

I wish Gillian Anderson would hook up with me (while in character as Scully...obviously)

[robsoles]

Ok, Gillian totally works herself up into character and completely comes on to you. Yep, Scully is gonna "hook up" with you, you lucky bastard!! On the other hand David completely misses the fact that she is just pretending, which is what acting is, and beats you to a pulp for (seeming to) having the affection he so desperately wanted for real.

I wish I was wealthy enough to just play all the time.

[auredium]

Granted! You can play all the time, wealthy enoug means no money and no job. But hell, since play can mean anything you are still happily playing on the street as a hobo.

I wish to own a succesfull multinational.

[S2UIRR3L]

Granted - Someone gives you a board game called Monopoly (International Edition). No one will play with you, so you always win by default.

I wish I had a kangaroo pouch, so I can carry my laptop hands free.

[GameX2]

Granted!
The kangaroo pouch simply can't hold the weight of the laptop and break. You see your 1500$ laptop falling on the floor, all these years of saving money gone...

I wish Adobe Master Collection CS9 ('Ya, CS9. XD Especially Premiere and AfterEffects) would come to Linux (I'M DREAMING. That'll never happen... XD). Oh, and 3ds Max as well.
My life would be complete. I would finally erase Windows without any problem.

[Metallion]

The CD its on sprouts legs and attends a meeting of the Tokyo Linux Users Group. Since there's a lot of stuff running Linux there, you could say it has come to Linux. Me and it have a few beers too many and I pin all the blame on it when we get in trouble with the police. It is now in a Japanese prison somewhere.

I wish to take my guitar over to Australia and do some jamming with robsoles.

[S2UIRR3L]

Granted - Rob smears some strawberry jam all over your guitar!

I wish for a Kawasaki 250 dirt bike.

[robsoles]

Better get your baseball bat coz the one I have for you is a lemon.

(Btw, I would never smear any kind of jam on anybody's guitar - not even if they were as useless as me at it).

I wish that, if Metallion makes it over here for some wicked jamming, he has 6 or months to help me improve enough to at least be nearly not very annoying to try to jam with!

[Eddy Gordo from Tekken]

Granted; a brand new Kawasaki 250 dirt bike is delivered to your door ready to ride...but the bike doesn't run on gasoline. it runs on $100 dollar bills, and gets 10 miles/bill. Your next motorcross is going to be expensive.

robsoles - granted Metallion stays for 6 months helping you improve. BUT you have to let him live with you & support him completely financially.

I wish that the Millenium Falcon was my commuter vehicle

[S2UIRR3L]

Granted - But with all the terrorism going on in the world, there's a mandatory global no-fly zone for star destroyers. It remains in your front yard, sitting on cinder blocks and makes a unique planter for flowers )

I wish for a 100% all natural horse burger with cheese from Burger King. (yeah, I would totally eat Mr. Ed if I had the chance)