The "Corrupt a wish" game

[Metallion]

You get exactly that. Nothing else changes including the processor and memory state or the passage of time in real life for that matter. The universe is stuck in this moment where nothing will ever change. You obviously can't use your computer now since your fingers moving to press a button on the keyboard would mean a change in the state of the universe.

I wish to hear Barack Obama's opinion on this lack of change.

[zombifier25]

Someone broke the rules again. In particular, the last poster did not corrupt the previous posters' wish. But that's OK, because according to the Imaginary Genie Rule Book, I get to corrupt both of your wishes.

You get exactly that. Nothing else changes including the processor and memory state or the passage of time in real life for that matter. The universe is stuck in this moment where nothing will ever change. You obviously can't use your computer now since your fingers moving to press a button on the keyboard would mean a change in the state of the universe.

I wish to hear Barack Obama's opinion on this lack of change.

Granted. He wakes up and finds everyone but you are frozen. You ask him for opinions, but he thinks you are some kind of mad scientist who froze everyone for world domination and knocks you out with his black-belt Karate skill, which according to the Constitution is a required skill for presidency. (I lied)

I wish I hadn't ate so much candy this morning.

Granted. I take you back in time so you can... wait, why are there two of you? OK, the past you is shoving a ton of candy into his mouth, so I'll let you here to sort it out. And I guarantee you, seeing or touching each other WILL NOT result in a paradox that vaporises the universe. (I also lied)


I wish Team Fortress 2 for Linux loaded faster and did not lag.

[tlhIngan]

A new patch coming out will fix the loading and lagging issues. Now that the lagging issues are resolved, more people will play resulting in a higher server load, causing more drag. You attempt t ofix this by overclocking your CPU, which results in overheating and thereby decreased performance, so Team Fortress 2 will still load slower.
I wish I could have written the stuff I was supposed to write already.

[Metallion]

You take Lord of Time's tardis and go back to coerce your old self to write the stuff for you. Since the old you is you, he objects and says you should write it. A fight breaks out that you eventually win. Your old self writes the stuff besides the missing teeth and broken bones. When you go back to your own time you find yourself suddenly crippled by all the injuries you caused yourself... and Lord of Time is waiting for you with a 2 by 4 in hand. He isn't happy about you just using his tardis like that.

I wish to clean up this dirty code I'm working on.

[tlhIngan]

You do, but after the clean-up, the code doesn't work anymore.
I wish I could've gone to bed at a more reasonable time last night.

[farrinux]

Your boss does too. Seems he caught you sleeping on the job and sent you packin.

I wish my server would actually serve me.

[S2UIRR3L]

Granted - Your server prints out a bench warrant for your immediate capture and arrest by the local police department... YOU'VE BEEN SERVED!!!

I wish March 5th would get here a little sooner so I can play Sim City.

[tlhIngan]

It is March 5th, but you've been so absorbed with NHL hochey coming back you actually forget about Sim City.
I wish I'd have supper already.

[robsoles]

You gobble down your supper only to find you ate it too quick and got a guts ache.


I wish the lawn and nature strips here would mow themselves.

[S2UIRR3L]

Granted - A new hybrid grass has been introduced and it has the ability to mow it's self. But it won't stop there... You wake up in the morning to find out you have a really bad hair cut as well.

I wish to trade living quarters with Robsoles