Personally, I think this is probably one of the best ways to handle a telemarketer.
I remember that one of the treasures on Wario: Master Of Disguise was the Telemarketer's Bane, a device that would constantly call telemarketers and ask them if their refrigerator was running.
Also one could follow their little script, play a Windows boot up sound from YouTube then ask if you need to be on the internet for them to help you, when they inevitably say yes, play a 56k dial up sound from YouTube as loudly as you can down the line.
Last edited by Henkdroid; June 7th, 2012 at 12:39 AM.
Where are my eyes? ... Oh there they are.
The first call was relatively short.
The second call they persuaded me to download LogMeInRescue and it ended like this:
Me: I cannot run a Windows executable, I can only open it as a self-extracting archive.
Support: Do you have Internet Explorer?
Me: No, i have Firefox.
Support: Have a nice day. Goodbye.
The third call lasted about 15-20 minutes. After a few futile attempts to start the Windows event manager they wants me to download and run Ammyy. Every time it ends up in Xubuntu's Archive Manager. This is repeated three times. They assume opening it meant running it and asks if i see "My ID". I tell them I now see three Archive Managers where I can see some binary components of the exe-file. When I later tell them I don't want to reboot, the conversation ends like this.
Support: Take the wire out of your computer...
Support: Do you have a desktop or a laptop?
Support: You take the wire out of your computer and you show it up your aas. Goodday Sir.
419 scammers, apparently, become viscously dangerous when they are themselves scammed.
Man, i'd wish they'd call me...
I've got THE prank that'll freak the living daylights out of em.
Here's how to pull it off:
1. Pick any random pop song that has a good bass rithm (i tried it with Swedish House Mafia - Greyhound ; worked perfectly)
2. Use any audio-editing prog like audacity to cutt the empty sound before and after the sound (there's always 1-2 seconds of blank audio track around the song)
3. Use said program to slow the song down by 90% and increase the low tones by 50%
4. Save to a non-compressing audio format (wav might take up a lot of space, but it's totally worth it!)
5. Skip to step 8 if you don't have a cell that can play audio w/o dropping the call
6. Upload the file to the phone
7. Skip to step 10
8. Get hold of a cheap audio-player or something and keep it close to the phone
9. Upload the file to it
10. Wait for the "prey" (call-center)
11. Don't say anything (AT ALL) (VERY IMPORTANT)
12. Play the file on repeat-one and make sure it's the only sound in the phone's mic
13. Put the phone on speaker if you want hear it
14. Wait for them to get scared and hang up
15. Laugh you *** off
The audio file's great for halloween too, just make sure you have a good bass in the speakers! (Mine are the size of my head, the bass-speaker alone, that is; the entire thing is the size of a chair)
"Everything that has a beginning, has an end." --an unexpectedly wise wallpaper
(I am using Audacity, by the way.)
I've attached two files, being the first 2.3 seconds slowed down by 90%. One is slowed speed, and the other slowed tempo.
I envy you guys. The best I received was some lousy scam mails that got moved to the Spam folder 99% of the time (thanks to Thunderbird's excellent spam detector) I do not bother myself with replying to them though. I'm not that smart like that Church of the Painted Breast dude.
Perhaps something like this:
When they call, say "Oh no my husband/wife/etc deals with this, but he/she/they did say that this PC and their work one was infected and needed a removal service. Can you call them please he/she/they will be SO grateful. Do you have a PEN? the number is 0017635698000"
Want an alternative to 99% of Windows applications?
"Dude, real programmers compile" - Plato 428BC
First time i got this call, it was a guy saying he was 'From the Microsoft Company' and they 'have detected a virus on my windows computer',
I immediately knew that this was obviously a scam to get your credit card details, so i said 'NO your wrong" and hanged up.
Got the same call week after, this time a woman claiming the same thing, this time i said 'I dont use windows' and she replied 'Sir, please just turn your computer' and I hanged up the phone.
Then not so long ago my brother said to them 'We dont have a computer in the house' i cant remember waht my bro said the guy's exact reply was, but it was something like 'But sir it's showing on our database that you do'
I must buy one of those things you connect to your phone and your able to block numbers.