Supermarket Speedway

[jetsam]

Hand basket reacing is first.

IN THE DOOR LIKE A FLASH, I HANDLE THE AUTOMATION DILEMNA LIKE NOBODY CAN...

I push the front pad, then saunter around back... and I'm back in front with a bottle of water, following the lil' ol' lady with a cart so close you'd almost think we're related by blood.

I don't wann make her nervous, so I open the stolen calistoga right there.

"Thanks JoE," I recite, a decibal too softly to be heard by anyone at all... exept the lil' ol lady with the cart, but the thing is... She must not be disturbed.

She's looking at pasta. I'm three aisles down in front of the razor blades... It only takes seconds to decide...

POPCORN. There's the cart, and it's free.

Munc
Munch
Munch.

This game I rule at.

The lil ol lady's sniffin' brussel sprouts.

My senses are tingling... I shouldn't be in produce. Somebody might notice.

[jetsam]

Oh heck... Tux is here.

bump.

[jetsam]

Nice. Mz. Chainy in 3rd Pole Position-- or is it rather her latest daughter... carrying a coathanger... I think maybe there's a satine scarf on it.

Satine... the color of schnemel.

schnemel. We don't know schnemel.


Schnemel's a lettle jewelry coating invented by Halliburton to keep the poor pigeons off the statues. If you spray it on your clothes, you never have to wash them. Everything rubs off of schnemel.