The Finish The Story Thread

[-grubby]

like cows that don't taste good. ANyway, they keep fighting when you show up . . . .

[stoodleysnow]

Which never seemed that good an idea anyway, since . . . .

[-grubby]

cows like to . . . .

[madscientist032]

cows like to . . . .

trample old people who use windows . . . .

[nikoPSK]

that are made of glass....

[-grubby]

and gates that are made of. . . .

[nikoPSK]

bill... and jobs that are made of....

[-grubby]

steve. And ballmers that are made of. . . .

[Six_Digits]

Dark chocolate for all the...

[nikoPSK]

ubuntu bars manufactured in my house with the gimp....

[Six_Digits]

and his friend GNOME both under the influence of...

[NullHead]

freshly brewed Ubuntu ...

[-grubby]

can't change the world. so Ironman and GODZILLA are fighting, you join in, and godzilla. . . .

[nikoPSK]

dies....

[-grubby]

of a heartattack. They're taking him to the hospital when .. . .

[nikoPSK]

he dies...

[-grubby]

he already died. so when he's going to the hospital the ambulance. . . .

[nikoPSK]

crashes and dies... of schizophrenia....

[-grubby]

and catches on fire. Then a pig suddenly . . . .

[nikoPSK]

is dreaming...

[NullHead]

of my tasty toast ...

[-grubby]

of going to the plan....ooops dwarf planet of Pluto which contains. . . .
EDIT: beaten to it

continuing: that is my toast, so I throw Frak's taxes at you and he. . . .

[wispygalaxy]

attacks and steals the toast...

[-grubby]

and I start tackling him because: hey it's my toast!!. . . .

[nikoPSK]

editing his underwear... so i rm his house....

[-grubby]

and he barely gets out in time before Compiz . . . .

[nikoPSK]

corrupts....

[NullHead]

and a hacker sshes in and sudo rm -rf /s in and ...

[-grubby]

he dies of an internal combustion on his part. Then you start rming my house only to realize. . . .

[nikoPSK]

I've rm'd you....

[-grubby]

and before it's too late I do the [censored] command on your house and it. . . .

[nikoPSK]

gets you banned from Ubuntu forums....

[-grubby]

and I start crying in the corner (btw if I'm banned how am I typing this post?). . . .

[nikoPSK]

you are an elite hacker so you got back on....

[-grubby]

and they ban you. . . .

[nikoPSK]

for being too good....

[-grubby]

and having that weird picture in your avatar. . . .

[nikoPSK]

and submitting the picture with the playboy ears....

[-grubby]

and forever scarring me. . . .

[nikoPSK]

inside and out....

[-grubby]

of the table went a big cup of tea, and this tea was so special because. . . .

[nikoPSK]

it contained....

[-grubby]

the teardrops of very ugly wallpaper that. . . .(btw have you noticed the last 15 or 16 posts have been us?)

[nikoPSK]

caused only us to post here....

[-grubby]

and make people think we have no life when we rally against. . ..

[nikoPSK]

drowning santas in snowbanks....

[-grubby]

and steal their. . . .
EDIT: WAIT!! you were talking about my avatar? I'm completely dense

[nikoPSK]

ubuntu cds....

[-grubby]

and kill their. . . .

[nikoPSK]

ipod nanos that are stuck with crappy songs on them and you cant reset em to factory (aka mine)....

[-grubby]

that are in his bag of. . . .

[nikoPSK]

bags....

[-grubby]

of bags. . . .

[nikoPSK]

of dead babies....

[-grubby]

that eat cookies that were diseased in 1987 with. . . .

[prodigalson666]

a terrible disease known as microsoft...

[-grubby]

windows 2.0 and santa suddenly imploded which meant. . . .

[nikoPSK]

the end of ze world...

[EXCiD3]

of Warcraft...

[nikoPSK]

and the newe world of starcraft (actually no, that'd be horrible...) just starctfat 3!

[-grubby]

which was hurdling towards. . . .

[nikoPSK]

the masters of the universe....

(PS everyone, all you regulars eg nullhead, frak dude with long name... come back! We need you! This thread is hurdling towards boringness! I mean, I read this entire thread one day. And all they way up to page 70ish made me laugh till my bowels hurt. We also need to say funny things not just things to continue the thread. This is a nice thread and I've been here since page 26 but now it's just getting lame. I'd like to see some funny posts like back in page 50. Comm on guys! I (and nathan) need you!.... Desperately!)

Niko

[-grubby]

***regarding above message***

CLEAN SLATE TIME!!! THIS THREAD ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE, LET'S FIX THAT, I'LL START: once upon a time (DO NOT SAY SOMETHING LIKE: "IN A LAND OF MARIGOLD, SAY SOMETHING LIKE "GOLDILOCKS WENT TO THE ....). . . .
EDIT: oh yah, if you're wondering why I'm concerned about this thread, I've been here since PG 14 and it's really sad to see it losing it's goodness
regards,
Nathan Grubb

[nikoPSK]

the three masters of the universe went to the house of the compiz translators....

[-grubby]

ate an Iphone, and choked on taxes but before they could pull the Heimlich maneuver. . . .

[nikoPSK]

my sister came to the rescue! Only to be....

[-grubby]

roundhouse kicked by chuck norris and. . . .

[EXCiD3]

strangled to death with a cordless phone by jack bauer

[-grubby]

who happens to have the power to generate phone cords magically with. . . .

[Frak]

magic IRS tax evasion...ess...

[EXCiD3]

through ssh of course

[-grubby]

and after he's done strangling people he tries to take on chuck norris but. . . .

[nikoPSK]

santa comes and....

[NullHead]

creates a transdimensional bridge that in turn brings a evil easterbunny through and he starts throwing egg bombs that sprout sunflowers on both the north and south pols of the earth witch in turn changes the axes of the earth and the gravity starts to lessen so we all start floating through the air witch is a bad thing because air plains don't work anymore with in turn makes the gas prices go down and we gain more poisoned ground from scraping the huge jets witch make the easter bunny want to stay on our side of the Transdimensional bridge so he can go to mars and ...

[-grubby]

and kill little children by shooting projectile. . . .

[NullHead]

peanut butter and jelly sandwitches that are frozen as hard as...(nathan are you on msn now? ill send add you as by buddy)

[-grubby]

santa and the little children crash into. . . .

[NullHead]

toaster ovens loaded with explosive e-mails spam bots that ...

[-grubby]

produce Iphones and Niko trips on the iphones resulting in. . . .

[NullHead]

the production of anti-matter ...

[smartboyathome]

Which colides with the happy planet of hangovers...

[-grubby]

and chuck nor....wait chuck norris can't be destroyed!!!!!!!!! and chuck norris bends antimatter so hard that. . . .
EDIT: beat to it
CONTINUE: and beverages and homer says "mmm.....donuts" which causes Chuck Norris to. . . .

[smartboyathome]

it flies into the center of the internet

[-grubby]

^post above doesn't work^ (I'll ignore it)

bend antimatter so hard that it. . . .

[nikoPSK]

causes me to play blackjack with a bunch of *******.... censored. I dont think people will appreciate the word. "hooker" I was reminiscing of futurama.

[-grubby]

[xxx]s that like Chuck Norris but he. . . .

[nikoPSK]

shoots his boss....

[-grubby]

and roundhouse kicks. . . .

[nikoPSK]

a panda....

[-grubby]

which is kind of mean but maybe it's panda antivirus. . . .

[NullHead]

witch its not it's a huge ice panda that shatters with the sound of a nuke going off...

[NullHead]

witch in turn breaks all of the iphones on the planet! ...

[-grubby]

but I throw toast at you and Frak isn't here to do his taxes :(. . . .

[NullHead]

but the toast burns so bad the antimatter gets turned to regular matter! and all the iphones turn into sandisks!!...

[-grubby]

which is my flash drive that I lost's brand name :(!!!! and I wanted to eat that toast :( but the sandisk's start. . . .

[nikoPSK]

throwing chuck chucks at you....

for clarification:
http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/e/e0/Chuckchucks.jpg

[-grubby]

and I also. . . .

[NullHead]

throwing chuck chucks at you....

for clarification:
http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/e/e0/Chuckchucks.jpg

who actually thinks I'm so lame he just laughs at me a runs off into the distance, In the mean time batman and robin are fighting crime with superman and chuck run up do superman and superman stats crying to forgiveness because ...

[-grubby]

he is wearing chuck norris pajamas. . . .

[nikoPSK]

and eating his underwear....

[-grubby]

with you and I'm eating my toast. . . .

[EXCiD3]

sitting with companion cube...

[-grubby]

and having fun but you. . . .

[EXCiD3]

had to euthanize him :(

[nikoPSK]

by taking off your shirt....

[-grubby]

and you staring at me but i start. . . .

[nikoPSK]

unloading a tommy gun....

[NullHead]

witch shoots jelly...

[-grubby]

and you die of jellinitis. . . .

[EXCiD3]

but you end up in linux heaven...

[-grubby]

but I don't die . . . .

[Frak]

you just fall over... really.... really hard...

[-grubby]

and end up scraping my knee. . . .

[allforcarrie]

after applying a bandage...

[nikoPSK]

mickey mouse comes and....

[NullHead]

gives you a hug but his fur is lined with super glue ....

[Nano Geek]

so you stick to him and...

[-grubby]

and end up losing so much blood that. . . .

[nikoPSK]

vampires come....

PS (who liked my chuck chucks?):lolflag:

[hvac3901]

and suck the blood from the neck of Ubuntu virgins that have unknowingly stumbled upon this threadomain in an otherwise useful forum.....

...,.J/K

[-grubby]

but Chuck Norris (who obviously must use Ubuntu) resists, creating. . . .

[Nano Geek]

a robot called Mark Shuttleworth: The Vampire Slayer. He attacks the vampires with only a flashlight and turned them all to dust. But as he was about to kill the rest of them...

[-grubby]

you come and join the thread again. . . .

[nikoPSK]

and we all rejoice, but to our dismay nathans weiner....

[nikoPSK]

(dog...):lolflag::lolflag:

[Nano Geek]

destroys Shuttleworth's flashlight, and the remaining vampires attack him. Just when it looks like it's all over...

[nikoPSK]

more vampires come and make it over....

[GepettoBR]

more vampires come and make it over....

the ledge, falling into a dark abyss. Just then...

[-grubby]

a giant triphone. . . .

[GepettoBR]

dialed 911 and...

[NullHead]

robotic chilly dogs come to take over the world ...

[-grubby]

but they are stopped by an unknown force, so unknown that. . . .

[new2*buntu]

nobody ever knew

[-grubby]

that it hid. . . .

[nikoPSK]

in my pants!

[Nano Geek]

It was about to be discovered when...

[nikoPSK]

I let one loose....

[NullHead]

into a complicated dance somewhat like the boogie ...

[nikoPSK]

but more like an.....

[NullHead]

electric popcorn maker that requires you to add water for ...

[Nano Geek]

producing I Can't Believe It's Not Butter spray. But as it was doing that...

[-grubby]

his pants exploded . . . .

[nikoPSK]

and I'm not going to be here till thursday....

[Nano Geek]

because you're in the hospital taking care of the third-degree burns on your legs. As he's doing that...

[nikoPSK]

I am actually going to sidney....

[GepettoBR]

in order to fight the terrible Sidney Kidney Stealers that are trying to...

[nikoPSK]

steal my pelvis.....

[-grubby]

back from elvis. . . .

[Nano Geek]

because he ate...

[-grubby]

Frak's taxes but Frak isn't here to intervene. . . .

[nikoPSK]

so I am going on the clipper....

[-grubby]

and find a girl named sydney. . . .

[Nano Geek]

who looks like a...

[-grubby]

very, disgusting, large, mcdonalds. . . .

[Nano Geek]

Ronald McDonald action figure that has the ability to...

[-grubby]

morph iphones and suddenly. . . .

[Nano Geek]

Steve Jobs with iPhone 6 came and turned Ronald into...

[GepettoBR]

The iPod Pico, only a few atoms in size, with an amazing 800TB storage and...

[-grubby]

but he gets squished by a. . . .

[GepettoBR]

Gigantic potato spud, brought forth by Bill Gates to...

[Nano Geek]

destroy the evil that is Linus Torvalds. But he accidentally hit the iPhone instead, so...

[NullHead]

EDIT: got beaten to it ... Gigantic potato spud, brought forth by Bill Gates to...

sell as the new windows spudnik OS ... what is does is explode you're computer into space to it can spread it's sypware all over the galaxy!!....

[-grubby]

destroy the evil that is Linus Torvalds. But he accidentally hit the iPhone instead, so...

he accidentally dialed 911 and we know what happened next, . . . .

[GepettoBR]

he accidentally dialed 911 and we know what happened next, . . . .

except it didn't happen, since a time-loop transported the iPhone, Bill Gates and Paris Hilton into 16th Century Italy...

[nikoPSK]

people came and.....

[NullHead]

ate donuts and coffee ...

[komputes]

eating the donuts walking with a limp, talking to a gutsy chimp telling him...

[nikoPSK]

he needs to play peggle....

[-grubby]

but Paris Hilton suddenly started hitting on Bill Gates. . . .

[nikoPSK]

but he turned her down for steve balmer....

[-grubby]

but Ballmer wanted to go for the Iphone, so he threw a chair at. . . .

[nikoPSK]

you...

[-grubby]

and you. . . .

[Frak]

and maybe me...

[-grubby]

by splitting the chair into 3 distinct but (broken) pieces that. . . .
YAY FRAK!

[nikoPSK]

(broken) all have a rare case of....

[nikoPSK]

YAY frak!

(glad you're back)

[-grubby]

(broken) all have a rare case of....

schizophrenia that consumed their whole face. . . .

[nikoPSK]

like nathan has now, I had my shots so I can never get it....

[-grubby]

but the chair still hits you even if you have the shot. . . .

[GepettoBR]

and you fall on top of the iphone...

[Nano Geek]

Which drops you on Mars where...

[GepettoBR]

Marvin the Martian is yet again trying to blow up the Earth because it blocks his sight of Venus

[Nano Geek]

which annoys him because...

[nikoPSK]

I have gas from all the beans I have....

[-grubby]

eaten but they are coffee beans not . . . .

[Frak]

pinto or baked beans...

[-grubby]

so steve ballmer suddenly decides that the Iphone sucks so he makes. . . .

[nikoPSK]

the zunephone....

[GepettoBR]

which sucks both metaphorically and literally, since it has inbuilt vacuum-cleaner functions

[-grubby]

which are kind of useless if you're in the American Civil War and you are the south and all you can do is eat cotton bails. . . .

[-grubby]

well, according to ~tito~ we're supposed to restart the story every 60 pages so here:

one day. . . .

[Frak]

there was a potato walking down that street that...

[-grubby]

got squished by a van . . . .

[Frak]

but just then, Spuds McKinzee comes up in his...

[-grubby]

mr. potato head costume. . . .

[tallgurl1337]

offering his assistance to the poor, dilapidated, complex carb...

[GepettoBR]

which, weeping, told him she loved him

[nikoPSK]

like her budgee....

[-grubby]

[budgee]eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet which was running low, but the . . . .

[nikoPSK]

green day...

[-grubby]

of the weeks decided to ruin it by. . . .

[Frak]

somehow putting green by day and creating a C6H10O5 molecule...

[-grubby]

but anyway spuds mcwhatever gets run over by A green truck from "green. . . .

[nikoPSK]

barf...

[-grubby]

corporations" . . . .

[nikoPSK]

of america.....

[-grubby]

*cough* I mean canada. . . ."

[nikoPSK]

I mean the barf corporation of nathan grubb was going on a trip to,...

[-grubby]

*cough*cAnAdA*cough*. . . .

[nikoPSK]

so they were going on a trip to canada....

[-grubby]

but we see you and say "oh no!!! RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!. . . ."

[nikoPSK]

because you are countryist....

[-grubby]

and you have a strong stance against country music. . . .,

[Nano Geek]

which hurts his ears because...

[nikoPSK]

of my second hand ipod that has horrbile songs on it....

[-grubby]

including "all my exes live in texas. . . ."

[Nano Geek]

which is actually a secret message written by the Russians during the Cold War that, decoded, says...

[Frak]

"I'm a little teapot, short and stout, here is my handle"....

[Nano Geek]

which refers to an old Russian folk-song about the demise of...

[Frak]

Nicholas II and his dog Toto...

[nikoPSK]

went to linux land where they followed the bsd road,.,..

[-grubby]

but the linux highway ran over it . . . .

[nikoPSK]

Please Mark This Thread As Solved.....

[Frak]

but instead, Trotsky and Marx came to preach about BSD, which in turn...

[Nano Geek]

ignited World War III. Unfortunately, with his vast wealth, Bill Gates crushed any opposition and the Dark Years of the Computer began. But all was not lost. A secret society of Linux users were planning a rebellion...

[nikoPSK]

against my keyboard....

[-grubby]

which involved slowly cutting it in half. . . .

[nikoPSK]

because sometimes keys stick and it doesn't register them sometimes....

[-grubby]

but my keyboard doesn't but anyway. . . .

[nikoPSK]

we kill your keyboard....

[-grubby]

so i can't play nexuiz (apt:nexuiz). . . .

[nikoPSK]

too bad for you....

[-grubby]

the person I usually play the game with, NikoPSK, just happens to break his leg . . . .

[nikoPSK]

when you shoot your gravity gun at me....

[-grubby]

and maybe frak should join us or nullhead or asdj.... . . . .

[nikoPSK]

on playing... but I decide to play starcraft....

[-grubby]

you meaniehead leaving me in the dust. . . .

[Frak]

but I diss both of you and start playing Tremulous (apt:tremulous)...

[nikoPSK]

which I have no lcue of but whatever...

[-grubby]

played it ate something that tasted bad (aka niko's blown off leg). . . .

[nikoPSK]

on my cool bean thread... http://ubuntuforums.org/showthread.php?t=635542

[-grubby]

which involves you blatanly stealing some of my beans. . . .

[nikoPSK]

LOL, and frak's....

[Frak]

which is a heavy risk due to caffeine poisoning...

[nikoPSK]

and gas.... (because beans give you gas...)

[-grubby]

but coffee beans don't give you gas. . . .

[nikoPSK]

so you enter this in the termianl:

%%blow

[nikoPSK]

and get this:

niko@home:~$ %%blow
bash: fg: %%blow: no such job
niko@home:~$

[-grubby]

and say :lolflag::lolflag::lolflag:. . . .